Vic Brotherson, owner and founder of the hugely popular London flower shop Scarlet & Violet, shares all her greatest tips and insights with Bridebook in this wonderful Q&A. From Star Wars buttonholes to ‘meadowy’ flowers to essential budgeting secrets – this is definitely one of our juiciest Q & As yet!
All pictured flowers by Scarlet & Violet.
How would you describe your signature style?
Gosh I have answered this question a few times and I still find it hard to put into words! I hope our signature are flowers that feel natural, uncontrived and meadowy, using blooms and greens that are interesting, detailed and textural . We arrange them as much as we can as if they have been picked and gathered from the garden, selecting tones and shapes that work alongside each other to build up to the finished bouquet or arrangement. It’s a bit like painting or drawing – layering and making sure that each stem has an impact whether just a subtle shadow or a shot of colour – each bunch is different and every day has its new beauties. We definitely tend to favour the more feminine, softer colours if left to our own choices.
Vic’s signature style is natural and meadowy… and we love it!
What is your #1 tip for a bride deciding on flowers?
I can’t resist giving more than one! My top tips include looking at everything you can and seeing what you love, and making sure that the flowers you adore are available at the time of year of your wedding before you set set your heart on them. Choose your dress and venue first as these may have an impact on the colours and style of the flowers. If you’re not sure look at both options made into bouquets – brights or softs – and trial them by taking them home and have a posing hour in front of the mirror! See which works with your skin tone and wedding dress colour. Take pics, see what looks good in photos – this is the crucial thing as so much of the day is about creating beautiful memories. Keep an open mind don’t be too set on specific flowers, as you may see something when you go to the flower store that changes everything. Don’t be nervous or scared of looking at everything as even the most novice of flower buyers suddenly has a favourite and it’s always surprising you have more of an idea of what you love than you would imagine.
How do you add character to a men’s buttonhole?
I’m probably not the best at this as I do favour timeless flowers – I definitely encourage the gents to get involved and choose what they love, be it a bundle of herbs or a rose bud colour that they love- again I am always surprised at how suddenly the choices are made once there are actual flowers to look at, hold and smell. It can all get quite specific for these tiny little bundles but then again they are the only male element to the flowers so most chaps suddenly speak out. We have used star wars characters, scrabble letters, badges, tied with a variety of ribbons and embraced a few different nations with a nod to various cultures with native flowers and foliages – men’s buttonholes can be fun but remember they should not be overwhelmingly large. (Read more about grooms attire in our article here).
What is your best flower budgeting tip?
Get everything else right first, chairs and tables, linens etc. Think about anything else that’s going on the table too and where you are up to budget and space wise and work backwards- there are lots of ways to economise on flowers – be clever with single stems, be inventive with inexpensive blooms and foliage, be careful about doing them yourself as it can be too much. Be upfront about your ideal budget and then its up to us to make sure that the flowers are the most beautiful and suitable to work within that.
The free and natural style lends itself perfectly outdoor weddings
Can you describe the most challenging assignment you’ve had?
I can’t think of one where I have felt any more frightened than usual – I am still nervous every wedding we do – I take what we do very seriously and not until it is all under way does my Saturday turn into a relaxed afternoon and I can breathe again!
What was your favourite moment from Kate Moss’s wedding?
Seeing the bridesmaids walk down the meadow walkway outside the church, that was my breathe again moment.
Whose wedding would you most like to do the flowers for – past, present or future?
My daughter, Betsy- a while to go yet but then I’ll be able to make all my favourites – so she’ll have to get married early June!
What was your favourite moment from your own wedding?
I’ve been married for 20 years – I was a florist and we got married early July so we had boxes and boxes of English delphinium for the church all down the aisle – it was such a memorable moment- the rest of the flowers were pretty minimal which just goes to show really that it’s just picking the right bits to focus on as there are flowery moments and none flowery moments.
Pair long stemmed and wild flowers with a variety of glass vases and you have the perfect vintage look
Well, here’s something you don’t see every day! Newlyweds Alex and Stef organised a personalised red double-decker bus to take their guests to Kirtlington Park, a gorgeous country house in Oxfordshire – and we absolutely love it.
The stylish Saloon was the perfect location to celebrate with a champagne toast, while at their outdoor cocktail reception, Alex, Stef and their guests enjoyed views of the beautiful Chiltern Hills – and had some fun playing lawn games too!
Congratulations, Alex and Stef! And thank you, Guy Hearn Photography, for letting us share these beautiful photographs.
It’s time to tackle something your wedding day can’t do without: your wedding vows. Now, you might be thinking of saying traditional vows – and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that! But if you’ve found this article, we expect you’re at least considering putting pen to paper and having a go at writing your own personalised wedding vows instead. So here’s our guide to getting started.
What Should You Do Before You Write Personalised Wedding Vows?
1. Get Permission
Before you do anything else on this list, check with your officiant that you can actually say personalised wedding vows. There may be limitations for some ceremonies and it’s always worth asking before you spend hours crafting those few perfect sentences…
2. Get Inspired
A good place to start is with traditional wedding vows. After all, they’ve stood the test of time for a reason! You may well be familiar with the standard Church of England vows:
I, (name), take you (name), to be my husband/wife, to have and to hold from this day forward; for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part, according to God’s holy law. In the presence of God, I make this vow.
Now, you may well decide that these vows – or those from another faith or source – will do you just fine! Or you might use them as the starting point for your own vows, thinking about which words you connect with. Similarly, take a look at examples of other couples’ wedding vows and see what you gravitate towards. You could also look through readings, poems, quotes and lyrics that resonate with you and remind you of your partner for inspiration.
3. Talk To Your Partner
Once you’ve got a feel for the sort of vows you like, sit down with your partner and talk about what you both expect from your vows. You might want to use the following questions as a starting point for your discussion:
What tone do you want? Are you expecting humorous or serious vows?
Do you want to make the same promises to one another or are you happy to say different things?
Would you rather write them together or keep them a secret until the big day?
Don’t underestimate the importance of this conversation. It’s super important that you and your partner are on the same page when it comes to your vows. You don’t want to start cracking jokes, only to find that your partner planned the opposite. And even if you think you’ll be going down the more traditional route, we’d still recommend a quick chat to iron out any potential hiccups. For example, it’s become increasingly common for couples to omit words like “obey” from traditional vows.
By Cinzia Bruschini
How Do You Write Personalised Wedding Vows?
1. Reflect On Your Relationship
Make yourself a cup of tea, grab a notebook and find somewhere quiet to take some time to think about your relationship and the life you and your partner share. What made you fall in love with one another? What hard times have you helped one another through? What do you admire about them and how have they made your life better? What do you share and how do they balance you? Don’t worry about it being perfect at this stage – it’s all about the raw emotions!
2. What Promises Are You Making?
When you say your vows, you’re making promises to your partner. What will you promise to have a happy marriage? A good place to start is the traditional promises: loving, caring for and supporting your partner through thick and thin. Then think about what promises might be specific to you two as a couple.
3. Start Writing
Now you have some ideas, it’s time to put pen to paper! If you’re stuck, try following this simple wedding vow structure:
Affirm your love for your partner
Praise their good qualities
Offer them your promises
Close with a final vow
You could also turn your vows into a narrative, building them around the story of your relationship or another anecdote that defines who you are as a couple. But remember, your vows should only be a minute or two long. Keeping things short will make them easy to memorise – plus, you’ll want to save something for your speech too!
4. Write From The Heart
Be authentic to yourself and your relationship. If you’ve chosen to write your own personalised vows, it’s likely because you want them to truly reflect you and your partner. Don’t worry too much about what other people have done!
5. Remember The Audience
At the same time, don’t forget about the audience. This day is about you – but your friends and family are still there! Make sure they don’t feel shut out when they listen to you say your vows, so think twice before including overly intimate moments or in-jokes that no one else will understand.
By John Lennie
How Should You Prepare To Give Your Personalised Wedding Vows?
1. Practice Makes Perfect
You want your vows to seem natural – but make sure you practise them at least once before your big day! Try saying them in front of a mirror or to a close friend, and make adjustments so that they sound like you, with no overly complicated or difficult sentences. You’ll also be able to get an idea of how long they take. Remember, they should only be a minute or two long – and while this sounds like not very long at all, it will feel like a lot longer on the day, especially with emotions running high!
2. Take Care Of The Little Things
When you write your vows out – and yes, you do need to, even if you think you’ve got them memorised! – make sure to do so on a clean sheet of paper or cue card. You don’t want a neon post-it note or the back of an envelope in your wedding photographs!
Just remember, as long as you write from the heart, your vows will be perfect – and guaranteed to bring a tear to every eye!
Your wedding speech as the bride is a special opportunity to express your love and gratitude to your spouse, your family, and your friends on your special day. In this guide, we will go over the steps involved in writing a memorable and impactful bride wedding speech.
Step 1: Determine the Purpose of Your Speech
The first step in writing your bride wedding speech is to determine the purpose of your speech. What do you want to achieve with your speech? Do you want to express your love and gratitude to your spouse, your family, and your friends? Do you want to thank everyone for being a part of your special day? Do you want to share your story and your journey together?
By determining the purpose of your speech, you can ensure that your speech stays focused and on track, and that you achieve your goals.
Step 2: Gather Your Thoughts
The second step in writing your bride wedding speech is to gather your thoughts. Take some time to think about your relationship with your spouse, your family, and your friends. Think about the moments and experiences that have shaped your relationship and brought you to this day.
Write down your thoughts and memories, and use them as inspiration for your speech. This will help you to personalize your speech and make it unique and meaningful.
Step 3: Write Your Speech Outline
The third step in writing your bride wedding speech is to write a speech outline. A speech outline is a basic structure that will help you to organize your speech and ensure that it flows smoothly.
Your speech outline should include an introduction, a body, and a conclusion. In the introduction, you can welcome your guests and introduce yourself. In the body, you can express your love and gratitude to your spouse, your family, and your friends. You can also share your story and your journey together. In the conclusion, you can thank everyone for being a part of your special day and wish everyone a happy future together.
Step 4: Write Your Speech
The fourth step in writing your bride wedding speech is to write your speech. Use your speech outline as a guide, and flesh out your ideas and memories. Keep your speech personal and heartfelt, and make sure to use a language that is accessible and easy to understand.
It is also a good idea to practice your speech several times before the wedding day. This will help you to get comfortable with the delivery and flow of your speech, and will give you a chance to make any necessary revisions.
Step 5: Rehearse Your Speech
The fifth step in writing your bride wedding speech is to rehearse your speech. Rehearse your speech in front of a mirror, or in front of a trusted friend or family member. This will help you to get comfortable with the delivery and flow of your speech, and will give you a chance to make any necessary revisions.
It is also a good idea to time your speech to make sure that it is within the allotted time frame for the wedding.
Step 6: Personalize Your Speech
The sixth step in writing your bride wedding speech is to personalize your speech. This means adding personal anecdotes, jokes, or stories that reflect your relationship with your spouse, your family, and your friends. Personalizing your speech will make it unique and memorable, and will help to engage your audience.
Step 7: Consider Your Audience
The seventh step in writing your bride wedding speech is to consider your audience. Who will be listening to your speech? What are their interests and expectations? What do they want to hear from you on your special day?
By considering your audience, you can tailor your speech to meet their needs and interests, and ensure that your speech resonates with them.
Step 8: Keep it Short and Sweet
The eighth step in writing your bride wedding speech is to keep it short and sweet. Your audience will appreciate a concise and well-delivered speech, rather than a lengthy and rambling speech.
Aim to keep your speech between 5 and 7 minutes long, and make sure to keep your speech focused and on track.
Step 9: End on a High Note
The ninth step in writing your bride wedding speech is to end on a high note. Your conclusion should be memorable, impactful, and leave a lasting impression on your audience.
Consider ending your speech with a heartfelt expression of love and gratitude to your spouse, your family, and your friends, or with a wish for a happy future together.
Step 10: Have Fun!
The final step in writing your bride wedding speech is to have fun! This is your special day, and your speech should reflect the joy and happiness that you feel.
Delivering the Bride’s Speech
Once you have written your bride wedding speech, it’s time to deliver it! Here are some tips for delivering a memorable and impactful bride wedding speech:
1. Practice, Practice, Practice
Practice makes perfect! Rehearse your speech several times before the wedding day to get comfortable with the delivery and flow of your speech. This will also help you to build confidence and overcome any nervousness you may feel.
2. Make Eye Contact
Make eye contact with your audience while delivering your speech. This will help to engage your audience and create a connection with them.
3. Speak Clearly and Confidently
Speak clearly and confidently, and use a natural and conversational tone. This will help to ensure that your speech is easy to understand and engaging.
4. Use Appropriate Body Language
Use appropriate body language to enhance your speech and convey your emotions. Stand up straight, smile, and use gestures to emphasize your points.
5. Take a Deep Breath
Take a deep breath before you start your speech, and take a moment to calm your nerves. This will help you to deliver your speech with ease and confidence.
6. Enjoy the Moment
Finally, enjoy the moment! This is your special day, and your speech is an opportunity to express your love and gratitude to your spouse, your family, and your friends. Trust that your audience will appreciate your effort and sincerity, and have fun!
In conclusion, delivering a bride wedding speech can be a rewarding and memorable experience. By following these tips, you can deliver a speech that is impactful, engaging, and heartfelt. Good luck!
Wahoooo. Your wedding day is swiftly approaching! It is set to be the best day of your life. Everything is planned, everything is ready and now it’s all about marrying the person you love and throwing one hell of a shindig! Party aside, the true emotion at any wedding comes from the heartfelt speeches. And since Bridebook is here for you all the way, we have some tips on how to write a Best Man speech.
We’ve all been privy to awkward best man speeches, long-winded routines performed by bridesmaids and monotonous ramblings from that random uncle. So, in this series of tips, we are going to guide your loved ones to give a speech that they (and you!) will be happy (insert sigh of relief here) to remember and your guests will love. First up is the naughtiest of the bunch… writing the Best Man speech.
Structure of the Best Man Speech:
Have an opening line that grabs everyone’s attention
Give your congratulations to the newlyweds (get a few more cheers)
Thank the other speakers
Say some nice words about the bride
Make a few jokes and tell a few stories about the groom
Propose a toast!
By Miki Photography
Tips for writing and delivering your Best Man’s Speech:
1) Give Yourself Time
Leave yourself enough time to write the speech. Very few of us can naturally wing it and have the audience laughing at everything we say. Prepare stories and categorise them, this will make structuring your best man speech much easier. Think of stories about the groom, the happy couple or the three of you together. It won’t go down too well if you talk only about the two of you and include in-jokes that no one is going to understand! Obviously, there has to be a few – you’re the best man. And you’ve got a lot of stories!
2) Do Your Homework
If you’re talking at a multicultural wedding, find out about any interesting sayings in the native language or fun and exciting traditions, as that shows you made an effort to connect with all of the guests. This is a great opportunity for an icebreaker, but make you don’t say anything inappropriate or offensive!
3) Pick a Theme
A good speech has a theme as this creates a flow. Rather than a random recollection of unconnected stories, think of a theme to tie it all together. A great theme to use is how on earth did X manage to ‘get’ Y. This allows you to bring up funny stories of X and flatter Y. Embarrassing jobs, stupid incidents, bad fashion – it can all come out – and it keeps a great tone as the speech is focused on the bride and what she is taking on!
By Anna Clarke Photography
4) Test It Out
Always read your speech to a third party, at least several days before the wedding, so that you have enough time for editing. Tip: do not read it to one of the groomsmen, no matter how much you want to. What may seem funny to the two of you over a pint may not be hilarious to the audience on the day. (Obviously it is funny but grandma might not think so.) Oh, and bring a printed copy of the speech with you, so that you aren’t panicked and scribbling last minute notes.
5) Be Funny
The pressure is on for the Best Man because everyone expects them to be one thing… funny. Not just ‘ha ha’ funny but ‘gut-wrenchingly’ funny. Just remember two things: this is a toast and not a roast and please, remember your audience! You are not there to humiliate the groom and upset the bride, you’re there to make sure everyone has a good time and a giggle. But make sure you get some good old mockery in there, you can’t let them off that lightly.
By Jamie Bott Wedding Photography
6) Compliments All Round
Compliment the bride and mention how lovely the bridesmaids look. This is traditionally expected in a Best Man speech and will get you extra brownie points! You can also compliment the party, the food and even the groom (before you start making jokes at his expense).
7) Pace Yourself!
Don’t be too drunk or go on for longer than ten minutes, both are guaranteed recipes for disaster. Instead, speak calmly to the bride and groom and leave time for all that laughter! There’s the rest of the night to hit the jaeger bombs! Use this sneaky tool to work out how long your speech will take – http://readtime.eu!
8) It’s all about the future
DON’T: mention any ex-girlfriends or conquests, at all, ever. It will only create awkwardness. Mention how you envision the newlyweds’ future together, you can make this part funny and witty, but also emotional and sweet!
By Guy Hearn
9) Mr and Mrs – Wahey!
Start your best man speech with a reference to his “wife” or “Mr and Mrs” as that will always guarantee an enthusiastic response from the guests. As will a few self-deprecating jokes, which are guaranteed to put the audience on your side.
10) End with a toast!
End your speech with a cheer, but telling all the guests to toast the newlyweds and their union! Most of all enjoy yourself. You’re talking about your best friend and their amazing new bride. So, have fun gathering all the stories, enjoy it and then party the night away!
By Allister Freeman
If you’re planning your wedding and reading this, make sure you send this article to your best man! Once you’ve done that, why not try our other wedding planning tools? Use your budget planner to sort out all of your wedding costs, your guest list tool to keep all your guests and their info in one place, and your wedding planning checklist, to make sure you don’t miss anything!
If you’re thinking about your honeymoon, your wedding must be getting close… How exciting! So, cast your mind forwards. You’ve just tied the knot with your best friend and celebrated by hosting the party of your lives. Where do you want to be?
Now, you might still read online that it’s the groom’s job to plan the honeymoon – but not every couple has a groom and some have two. So scratch that! Put your heads together and dream big. Here’s how to get started.
Do your research. What’s out there – and, more importantly, what do you want? Do you see yourselves on safari or are you more of a city break couple? Maybe you can’t imagine anything worse than lying on a beach and top of your list is skiing and snow. Whatever you decide, we’d always advise making sure the first few days are as relaxing as possible if you plan on taking your honeymoon straight after your wedding. Trust us, you’ll need the downtime!
One of the first things you need to decide is how much time you both take off for your honeymoon. You might keep it short and sweet with just a week or kick off a year-long round-the-world trip. As soon as you’ve decided, book the time off work and make any other arrangements (who’s going to walk the dog, water the plants, feed the fish…). And be realistic about the time you have – don’t try to pack a month’s worth of travel into two weeks. You’ll just end up rushing from one place to the next and come back more frazzled than you started!
Always let airlines and hotels know that you’re newlyweds – it might get you a free upgrade or some special treatment! We do always advise that you make sure you have some form of documentation to prove you’re married though as not everywhere will take you at face value. Try to pay for everything with a credit card that lets you save up air miles too – first class, here you come!
4. Sort The Paperwork
We know – not exactly the most exciting part of planning your honeymoon. But make sure all your documents are up to date – especially if you’re planning on changing your name. You don’t want your big break ruined by an expired passport…
This is the holiday of a lifetime – so go the extra mile. Have a think about what you can do to make this holiday extra special and do a little work on the DL to plan a few sneaky surprises for your partner.
Instead of jetting off straight away, why not start off with a few days away somewhere a little closer to home? Then you can focus on planning your wedding without the stress of thinking about a big trip at the same time – and you’ve got time to save up again too!
Once you’ve secured some of the biggest aspects of your wedding, such as your venue and catering, you can start thinking about inviting your friends and family to be there on your special day. Of course, that means you need to send out dozens of wedding invitations letting everyone know about the date, time, place, food, gift registry and more.
It’s a super exciting part of your wedding planning journey. However, just like with every other step of planning your wedding, it comes at a cost.
In the UK, couples spend an average of £400 on wedding stationery, which includes your save-the-date cards, invitations, name cards, seating plans, signage, menus and more. Basically, it includes anything that requires printing or writing onto card or paper. Your stationery certainly isn’t the biggest cost associated with your wedding, but when the average UK wedding costs £20,775, even the smaller costs can make a difference to your overall wedding budget.
But, that’s not to say that you need to spend even close to this amount on your own wedding stationery if you can’t afford it. There are plenty of tips and tricks you can utilise to spend less but still get wonderful, on-theme invitations and more. In this post, we’re going to explore how to save money on wedding stationery to help you stick well within your budget.
Just because you don’t want to spend anything close to the average doesn’t mean you’ll have sub-par stationery. With a touch of creativity and thriftiness, cheap wedding stationery can still be effective and make an impact.
Consider sending paperless post, especially for your save the dates. Save the dates don’t need to be as formal as invitations, so have fun with them and get creative – though you’ll probably want to do a little more than a text. Sending electronic save the dates is great, as they’re cheaper than paper and you can track who opens them too (fantastic if you want to make sure that everyone received and read your important news). Also, websites like Paperless Post have some stunning designs, with designers like Oscar de la Renta and Kate Spade bringing a touch of chic to your online post.
Alternatively, you could create a video save the date, which you can upload to YouTube as unlisted and share with everyone you want to come. Something like this is unique and fun, and will help your guests to remember to keep their calendars free.
When picking your invitation design, have a look at our enormous directory of fabulous stationery suppliers. There’s a huge selection of styles, as well as opportunities for bespoke design if you’re feeling creative. The best part is, with so many options available, you’ll be practically guaranteed to find a supplier that suits your budget. Many will be able to create unique, handmade invitations that match the style of your wedding.
It’s also worth checking out sites like Vista Print, which will usually be able to print your invitations for a lower rate. The downside is that unless you also hire a professional designer, you’ll have to pick from a selection of templates. If you do this, your invitations won’t be unique to you, but they will save you plenty of budget. So consider what priorities are most important to you.
You know that beautiful colour you’ve chosen that ties your entire style and motif together? You should definitely use it on your stationery. Choosing one colour for your invitations saves on printing and gives them a modern and elegant look. It also helps to keep everything cohesive.
This may be risky – especially if you only have a cheap printer – but if you have a decent home-office setup it’s worth considering. Ask for your invitations to be sent to you in PDF format and print them at home yourself. This is especially useful if you have to do some last-minute re-prints or additions. Alternatively, if you have an understanding employer, why not save more money and print a few things from the office? Just make sure you don’t print hundreds of sheets in one go and annoy your colleagues by hogging the printer all afternoon.
Be aware that the DIY printing route may save you money initially, but it isn’t without its drawbacks, and is unlikely to give you the clean, polished look of professionally-printed wedding stationery. And if you mess up, it may cost you more in the long-run, as you’ll have wasted lots of paper and ink.
Once you’ve sent your invitations, save some money on return postage and ask your guests to RSVP online. This will be brilliant when you start chasing people up or start on your seating plan. You can even do this for free by setting up a brand new email address: something like tomandjenwedding2024@email.com will more than do the trick. That way, you won’t have to use your own email address and risk emails getting lost among your day-to-day emails.
While a professional service will produce fantastic state-of-the-art wedding invitations, they’re not necessarily cheap (after all, you get what you pay for). If you have either experience using design software or crafting with paper, you can generally save a lot of money by simply designing your invitations yourself. Then, you’ll have all the designs at your disposal, so you can make any changes you need to later on and not pay a penny.
Alternatively, you could always take a few calligraphy lessons and have a go at hand-writing your invitations for the extra level of class and elegance. Calligraphy is a tricky skill, but there are plenty of tutorial videos available on sites like Calligrascape. Just keep at it and make sure you have plenty of practice before sitting down to write your final invitations.
Do note that while the DIY approach can of course be cost-effective, there are some risks to be aware of. Designing your invites, sourcing the paper, having them printed, assembling your invites, addressing your invites… it all takes a lot of time, especially when you’re also juggling plenty of other pre-wedding tasks.
Designing, finding the paper, buying the paper, printing the invites or finding someone to print for you, assembling the invites, addressing envelopes… the time all adds up when creating wedding stationery at a moment in your life when you’re juggling lots of pre-wedding tasks. Mulling over the right font and design might be stressful as well, not to mention it might not be as cheap as you think! Beautiful wedding stationery can require expensive kit and materials which isn’t readily available to you in the way that it is for a professional stationer. Plus, many wedding stationers buy their card and embellishments in bulk, and have a well-researched list of wedding suppliers to help them keep costs low. Buying in the smaller quantities or from mainstream retailers used for DIY comes with a premium, so make sure you factor this in, and weigh up both options carefully.
Instead of printing 80+ personalised invitations, why not reduce time and costs by not including the name of your invited guests? If you do want to include the recipient’s name, you could leave a blank space for you to write it out once the invitations are back from the printers.
It can be tempting to create fancy stationery, but every additional ribbon, foil trim or magnet you include will add to the price. If you want something a little more than a rectangular piece of card, consider a little low-cost creativity, such as a uniquely shaped invitation or by including some confetti inside the envelope.
Remember when you could get a book of stamps for about £1? Unfortunately, those days are long gone, and if you’re sending invitations to friends and family across the country (and beyond) you could end up spending close to £100 on postage alone. There’s nothing wrong with hand-delivering your save the dates and invitations, especially if it saves you a bunch of money.
To keep your invitations small (and costs down) only include information that’s relevant and important. For example, if you’re not offering your guests a choice of food, don’t worry about including a menu. And unless your venue is difficult to find, the name of the venue, the town or city, and the postcode should be more than enough.
One way to save a heap of space on your invitations is by directing people to your wedding website. If you’re confident in building websites you could do this yourself, or use a tool that offers you templates, like Wix.
Or, you could hire professionals to do it for you, like Simple Wedding Websites. A wedding website can be used for everything from sharing menus, a gift registry, detailed directions to the venue, and a form so your guests can RSVP.
Before you skip to the next tip, stick with us. When deciding how many invitations to order, just bear in mind that the more you order, the cheaper the cost will be per invitation. Plus, you’ll probably want to keep a few for yourself to stick on the fridge or frame later on.
For example, if you need 50 invitations, then by ordering 60 you might pay £2 for each, which will cost you £120. But, if you order 75 at £1.50 each, it’ll cost you £112.50. Not only is it cheaper, but you’ll also have some left over to keep or replace if one or two get lost in the post.
Using premium card or paper for your stationery is the way to go if you want that extra touch of luxury, but it could mean that you pay a lot more. Of course, you might not want to choose the cheapest option, but something middle-of-the-road will still be of a reasonable quality without eating into your budget.
Before you even consider sending your design to the printers, make sure you proofread your stationery several times. The last thing you want is to open your order and find that ‘Birmingham’ is spelt ‘Birnimgham’, and then have to correct it and have it printed all over again.
If you can, ask several people to proofread it for you. The more eyes the better. If you don’t want to do that, make sure you proofread it yourself at least a day after writing it so you approach it with a fresh pair of eyes. Another handy tip is to print it out so you can read it on paper, and read it aloud. Trust us, doing it this way will help you to catch mistakes that you otherwise might miss.
Before placing any orders, search on popular discount sites for codes that will save you money. Printers regularly have offers, like free shipping or 20% off, so don’t hit that final ‘submit’ button until you’ve had a thorough look for a valid code.
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Your wedding stationery is the first glimpse most of your guests will have of your wedding – and no pressure, but you want them to be blown away! This is when you start to reveal who you are as a couple and what your wedding is going to look like (as well as, you know, actually letting everyone know the wheres and whens of it all…) But there’s a whole world of wedding stationery out there – so let’s break down what you need and how to get started choosing it.
This is about what wedding stationery you need, not what wedding stationery you want! At a minimum, we tend to expect most couples to send a save the date, followed by a wedding invitation suite – which is just a fancy way of saying your wedding invitation plus some added extras: an RSVP card and your wedding information sheet. On top of this, you’ll also likely be ordering wedding programmes and place cards for the day.
What Information Should You Include On Your Wedding Invitations?
Keep your wedding invitations short and sweet – that’s why you send an information sheet too! Your wedding invitation should include the following key information:
Who’s invited
Your names
The date and time of your ceremony and/or reception
The venue and location of your ceremony and/or reception
Dress code
Number of +1s (if any)
RSVP details
By This and That Photography
What Information Should You Include On Your RSVP Cards?
Your RSVP cards are for your guests to fill out to let you know whether or not they’re attending and any additional details – so they’ll be providing you with the information! Leave them space to:
Your invitations should reflect your wedding so start off by thinking about the overall vibe you want for your wedding. If you’re thinking about your stationery, you’ve probably gotten somewhere with finding your venue – so where’s it going to be? Invitations for a rustic countryside affair will likely look pretty different to ones for a chic soirée in the city centre.
If you’re not sure yet, keep it simple. Consider going for traditional cream, white or ivory invitations with gold or black ink, then add any pops of any colours you’re keen to include on your big day.
Next, you’ll want to think about printing. Now, there are a few different ways of getting your invitations printed – and this can have a huge impact on cost as well as aesthetics, so don’t take this decision lightly! The best way to choose what sort of printing you want is to get samples and see what you like when you’re holding it in your hands.
The most high-end option is engraved printing, which creates raised letters on thick paper. This will give your stationary the most luxurious look and feel. Thermographic printing is a good alternative if you’re on a tighter budget, as this gives a similar look at a lower cost. However, bear in mind that the letters will look slightly shiny if you decide on using this method.
Letterpress printing, on the other hand, might be thought of as the opposite of engraved printing as it results in indented, rather than raised, letters. This is slightly different to embossed printing which doesn’t use any ink and tends to be best for details like monograms.
Your two cheapest options are likely to be digital printing and offset printing. Digital printing is incredibly versatile – think of it as a professional version of the printing you might do at home. Offset printing, on the other hand, uses plates to transfer letters and images and can result in a slightly higher quality product.
By Weddings Vintage
How Should You Send Your Wedding Stationery?
When you design your wedding stationery, remember you’ll be posting them! Traditionally, wedding invitations are a 4’5 x 6’25 inch rectangle. Today, however, many couples choose to send round, square or custom-shaped invitations – and these unconventional shapes can cost more to send.
If you’re asking your guests to mail their RSVPs back to you, budgeting for and including pre-addressed return envelopes and stamps can be a nice touch.
On a similar note, don’t forget to budget for envelopes! Get these as soon as possible. And if you’ll be addressing your envelopes yourself, do it in stages. This will help avoid making careless mistakes.
Proofread, proofread and proofread again! If you can, ask at least two other people to give your invitations a once over as well. Our top tip is to read the text from right to left or end to beginning as this will help you catch any small errors.
Always order a few extra invitations! It’s always good to have a backup in case of any mistakes – and you or your parents might want one as a keepsake too.
If you can, try to order all your wedding stationery in one go. This includes your save the dates, wedding invitation suite and thank you cards, as well as any extras like programmes and place cards.
So you’ve found your venue, made your guest list and organised a delicious wedding menu. Then all you need to really get the party started is the entertainment. So let’s work out what you’re after and give your guests a day to remember!
What Kind Of Wedding Entertainment Is Out There?
Well… Just about anything, if we’re honest with you! You could go for anything from photobooths and fireworks to cartoonists and ceilidhs. Or you could organise games for your guests, like coconut shys or croquet. And, of course, there’s music – which is so important we’ve dedicated an entire article to it here.
How Much Should You Spend On Your Wedding Entertainment?
Depending on their overall budget, we expect to see couples spend anything from £300 to £1,500 on their wedding entertainment, with the average couple spending about £500. Remember, this includes your music too and the costs involved here can range. If you decide to go the DIY route, for example, putting together your very own ultimate party playlist will cost you nothing at all – but you could also hire your favourite band and really splash some cash.
When Should You Bring Out Your Wedding Entertainment?
This depends on what forms of entertainment you’re providing. If it’s just music, the answer is obvious: whenever you want to hit the dancefloor. But you might also decide to spread entertainment throughout the day, especially if your wedding isn’t child-free. It’s always a good idea to consider providing some form of entertainment straight after the ceremony as this is when you’re likely to be busy taking wedding photos, leaving your guests to entertain themselves. It’s not a must though – you can always pop on a playlist and let your guests catch up while they enjoy a drink and a canapé or two.
When Should You Start Looking For Wedding Entertainment?
Give yourself at least six to nine months to find your wedding entertainment. That means you’ve got enough time to work out what you want, go and see some options and make a final decision. It also lessens the chance that you discover your dream dance troupe – only to find they’re fully booked.
By Jamie Bott Wedding Photography
How Should You Choose Your Wedding Entertainment?
Start off by sitting down with your partner and talking about what the two of you want. Then consider your guests. If you’ll be inviting children to your wedding, what has the best chance of keeping them busy? Clowns and balloon artists are classic choices here. And what will your grown-up guests appreciate? Maybe you really want to wow your guests, and in that case, you might explore fire-eaters or fireworks displays. On the other hand, you might be from a family of foodies – in which case, look at options for DIY food stations.
Then spread the net wide! Ask friends, friends of friends, your venue, other engaged couples… Get as many ideas and recommendations as possible. Think about any weddings or other events you’ve attended recently – did any of them have any really spectacular entertainment options?
Now it’s time to get out there! If possible, try not to book your wedding entertainment without seeing them in person beforehand. We’re sure you won’t but you don’t want to book blind, only to discover on your wedding day that you’ve been duped. Plus, it makes for a great date night activity!
You’re marrying your best friend – and as far as we’re concerned, that merits the celebration of the century. For many couples (and their guests!), that means one thing: alcohol. And lots of it.
But the world of wedding alcohol can feel overwhelming. Should you have an open bar or a cash bar? What drinks will you serve? And how much alcohol do you even need?
Hang on a minute! Don’t decide it’s easier to just ask your guests to BYOB just yet (although we won’t judge you if you do). Here’s everything you need to know about wedding alcohol.
Should You Have An Open Bar Or A Cash Bar At Your Wedding?
Of all your options, an open bar is the most expensive – so it comes down to how much you have to spend. But an open bar doesn’t necessarily mean putting on the works, so consider different types of limited open bars before you ask your guests to pay. For day- and lunchtime weddings, for example, a wine and beer bar tends to be more than enough.
On the other hand, if you are on a tighter budget, a cash bar could be a great option. Your guests will be able to drink exactly what they want – and you won’t need to worry about footing the bill! One thing we will say is that if you can, it’s always a nice touch to still make sure you’ve got in some champagne for the speeches.
What Drinks Should You Serve At Your Wedding
If you can, aim to provide the following alcoholic drinks:
White wine
Red wine
Sparkling wine
Light beer
Dark beer
Spirits
On top of this, you should also provide at least one soft drink option, as well as plenty of water.
A limited drinks selection is an easy way to cut costs – and speed up service.We’d recommend spirits be the first to go. Spirits (especially shots) can push prices – as well as your guests! – over the limit, so ditch them in favour of a premixed cocktail. A signature cocktail is always a great touch to any wedding drinks menu, whether that’s a bespoke drink created just for you or a classic cocktail that has a special meaning for you and your party. You could even rename the drink after yourselves!
For a more limited drinks selection, you might want to offer the following:
One red wine
One white wine
One light beer
One dark beer
One signature cocktail
Again, you should always provide at least one soft drink option and water on top of this.
How Much Alcohol Should You Buy For Your Wedding?
You should generally allow for two drinks per hour per guest during your drinks reception, and one drink per hour per guest from then on. You might think that these quantities sound smaller than expected – but remember that for every colleague that loves a martini, there’s a great aunt who’ll sip a small glass of champagne. On top of that, you’ll have guests who won’t drink at all. We tend to budget for soft drinks and mixers for 25% of guests.
As for the remaining 75%, you probably know best! As a general rule, wine tends to be the most popular option at weddings, followed by beer, and finally spirits. But always consider your audience! At an Irish wedding, Guinness might be the go to – while if you or your partner are from the West Country, cider could be the drink of the day. The other thing we would recommend is keeping your wedding date in mind. In the summer, it’s unlikely that many people will go for red wine, instead opting for white wine, champagne or light beers. In the winter, on the other hand, we’d expect to see more people drinking red wine or darker beers.
Once you’ve got an idea of what your guests will be drinking, break your alcohol down into measures:
A bottle of liquor contains 30 single shots or 15 double shots
A bottle of wine contains five glasses
A key of beer contains 124 pints or 165 can-sized servings
Here’s an easy formula to get you started:
(number of guests x length of drinks reception x 2 x 0.75) + (number of guests x length of afterparty x 0.75)
You should always order 10-15% on top of that – so that no matter what, you don’t run out of alcohol! If you can, buy your booze on a “sale or return if unopened” basis. But if you can’t, don’t worry – alcohol doesn’t go off, so you can always keep the party going with a post-honeymoon celebration.
Your wedding day is one of the biggest days of your entire life – and you’ll want to remember every detail! One way to do that? Hiring a wedding videographer to capture absolutely every moment in a gorgeous wedding film that you can watch back for years to come. But that’s a big responsibility – so here’s how to find the wedding videographer that’s your perfect match.
Start off by sitting down with your partner and working out what you want from your wedding film. Look on Pinterest, Instagram and YouTube to see what other couples have done, or check out other events videography if you want to cast the net a bit wider. What style of wedding film do you like? Every videographer has a different style so give some thought to whether you want something with more of a “documentary” or “fly-on-the-wall” style or something that feels more like a narrative.
By Ross Harvey
2. Ask For Recommendations
Recently married friends will be more than happy to share their wisdom – and show off their wedding film too! You could also ask your wedding photographer if they’ve worked with any fantastic wedding videographers.
When you put together your shortlist of videographers, don’t be swayed by just their showreel! We recommend watching three complete wedding films from each videographer to really get a feel for their style and standard. Think about how each film makes you feel too. Does the videographer capture the emotions of each couple’s big day? The mark of a good videographer is being able to truly transport you back to that wedding day – and make you wish you’d been invited!
Once you’ve found two or three videographers you love, meet them in person and make sure you get along. On your wedding day, your videographer (and potentially their assistant too) will be following you from dawn to dusk – so it’s important you like them!
5. Pin Down The Details
Take some time to clarify exactly what you want from your videographer, whether that’s on your big day or in the finished film. For example, if you don’t want your videographers moving around during the ceremony, make sure to let them know you’d prefer it to be filmed statically.
Now that you know ALL about wedding flowers, let’s delve into deeper bloom(ing) detail with our specially selected tips, so that the flowers you choose will be the best you’ve ever seen.
1) Pinterest
Ahhh Pinterest, the source of endless wedding inspiration/work distraction/a world of awesomeness… but, Pinterest can give you unrealistic expectations. While it is good knowing what flowers you like, don’t expect exact replicas from your florist. A florist is first and foremost an artist and has his or her own vision – so just make sure you have the same one. And create something even better than everything you’ve seen.
Yes, in the modern world almost any bloom can be delivered to you at any time of year. However, very occasionally this may not be possible. So be open and welcome to alternatives. You never know, they might be better and cheaper than your originally chosen flowers! Sneaky note: for an earthier feel, look at using only greenery – it can look really beautiful and different and not as high maintenance as fresh flowers!
By Ross Harvey
3) Perfume
While it is easy to choose a flower based on what it looks like, you should also consider what they smell like. Lilies have an incredibly rich scent and if you mix them with another fragrant flower, the effect may be overwhelming. Instead, opt for one dominating scent that won’t become overwhelming in the course of the evening. Your florist will know all about this so be open to their ideas.
Don’t forget that your flowers should reflect your personality! If you are a person that loves bright and vibrant colours, let your flowers represent that. If you are a romantic and an old soul, then choose your flowers accordingly. Your flowers are as much a part of your décor as your personalised favours and they should tell a story.
By Ross Harvey
5) Location
Yes, your flowers should represent you perfectly, however, they also need to work well with your wedding venue! If your reception site has tall ceilings, go for taller flowers to fill up the space. Similarly, if you are getting married somewhere with low ceilings, your flowers shouldn’t crowd the room! Again, your florist will know exactly what to do here so don’t worry, you aren’t meant to know all of this.
By Weddings Vintage
6) Colour scheme
If you happen to know the colour scheme of your wedding dress already, make sure to tell your florist! “White” is often not a completely accurate description! Even better, if you know the texture of your dress, or of the bridesmaids dresses, bring some samples!
By Anna Clarke Photography
7) Bouquet
So here’s the secret on how to carry your wedding bouquet properly (pass it onto the bridesmaids too!). Don’t hide your waist behind the bouquet as your waist is the narrowest part of your body. Instead, carry the flowers at hip height. For all this to work, your bouquet must be the correct size – again your florist will help with this.
Make sure your wedding bouquet is comfortable to hold. You want to look relaxed and beautiful, not like you’re coming to the end of a weight lifting session – sweaty bride probably isn’t what you’re going for. So, talk this through with your florist to make sure you’re comfortable. Same goes for younger bridesmaids or flower girls – you don’t want little munchkins carrying heavy bouquets.
Consider how you want your flowers to look in photographs. If you want them to be the dominating pop of colour, or the final subtle touches – think before you purchase!
When you picture your dream wedding, what do you see? Are you standing on a white sandy beach with a crystal blue sea view? Perhaps you’re surrounded by historical castle ruins? Or are you nestled within a quaint garden lit up by thousands of twinkling fairy lights?
The venue you choose for your wedding sets the tone for so many parts of the day: style, theme, catering, and even your wedding guest list. So not only do you need to pick the perfect venue to reflect your personality and relationship, but it also needs to be big enough to fit all of your family and friends, as well as align with your budget.
Many couples use separate sites for the wedding ceremony and the reception. However, doing that means paying two separate costs that include venue hire, staff costs, facilities costs and more. Instead, if you host both events at one location it can greatly reduce what you pay. Thousands of venues can host the ceremony as well as the wedding breakfast and the evening reception. Not only will this save you money on the venue, but it also means you don’t have to worry about transport for your guests. Plus, it saves you time, energy and stress. The only exception to this is church weddings, where there aren’t generally the facilities to host a post-wedding celebration.
Plus, if you’re getting married in a hotel, all your guests have to do is stumble upstairs at the end of a long night of partying – and you may even get your night in the honeymoon suite heavily discounted if your guests fill enough rooms.
Cutting friends, colleagues, acquaintances and even family from your guest list can be tough – but some sacrifices are worth it. If you’re on the fence about this, know that a smaller guest list reduces the budget spent and increases your venue options. Most places have a dining capacity of between 100 and 150, so an extensive guest list would result in you missing out on so many amazing venues.
The average amount of money spent per guest at a wedding is £200, which includes everything from the venue to the catering. To put this into perspective, a table of eight guests will set you back around £1,600. That’s something to bear in mind when giving a +1 to your colleagues.
A smaller guest list also means you’ll spend less on food, decor, table placements, drinks, invitations and more. If you struggle to make too many cuts to the guest list, at least try seating them at bigger tables. This will save you money on centrepieces and it will encourage everyone to chat with each other.
Many couples prefer a weekend wedding: it’s the day when most guests can make it, as they have fewer work commitments. However, you can make significant savings if you book a midweek wedding, so it’s definitely worth asking your friends and family to book a day or two of annual leave. Here’s a rough breakdown of what wedding venue costs can look like when hosted on different days of the week:
Monday – £7,175
Tuesday – £5,938
Wednesday – £6,040
Thursday – £7,112
Friday – £8,045
Saturday – £8,041
Sunday – £7,410
As you might expect, Fridays and Saturdays are the most expensive days when it comes to the cost of a wedding venue, at a little over £8,000 for each. If you are set on a weekend wedding, Sundays are the most affordable option at around £600 less than a Saturday.
Or, to make the biggest savings, why not consider a Tuesday wedding? It’s more than £2,000 cheaper to get married on a Tuesday when compared to a Friday or Saturday – it might not be the most convenient of days, but it is the most affordable. You’re also likely to find that other vendors, such as photographers and entertainers, also have far more competitive rates when you book them for a midweek wedding.
Many couples opt to take the traditional route, which involves getting married around lunchtime or early in the afternoon, followed by a wedding breakfast and finally an evening reception with a buffet and dancing.
To slash the cost of your venue, why not consider a twilight wedding? A twilight wedding is a wedding that takes place in the late afternoon or early evening, and takes advantage of the natural beauty that comes when it starts to get dark.
The only difference is that you condense everything that would happen during 8 – 10 hours of a traditional wedding into 4 – 6 hours. So, you’re also likely to cut the expensive wedding breakfast and go straight to the evening buffet.
To put this into perspective, Friern Manor Country House Hotel in Essex provides a traditional wedding package starting at £7,995, while the cost of a twilight wedding package starts at £3,500. This is a massive saving, while still ensuring you get the wedding and venue of your dreams.
Due to regional running costs like for like, the cost of wedding venues can vary hugely across regions. For example, couples who host their wedding in London pay an average of £10,062 for their venue, which is around £2,500 more than the UK average. It’s hardly surprising that venues in London naturally face higher running costs around property, rental and business rates than in other locations in the country. But this is something to be aware of when allocating your budget.
As a general rule, countryside weddings are often cheaper than those in major cities. For example, Couples who get married in Yorkshire and the Humber pay an average of over £5,500 less for their wedding venue than couples in London. This applies not only to venues, but all the other vendors you’ll hire too, including caterers, photographers, wedding entertainment and celebrants.
So, if you do live in a major city (especially the capital) and are on a budget, why not consider a wedding outside of your hometown? Plus, getting married away from home adds to the excitement and magic of getting married and could make for a handy central location if you have guests travelling from all over the UK.
In the UK, peak wedding season is between April and September, with June weddings costing the most, at an average of £23,989. As wedding venues are in high demand during these months, that’s when they’re the most expensive. So, if you’re conscious of your wedding budget, consider avoiding these months.
Between October and March, when there’s generally less demand for wedding venues, costs can be considerably lower. In fact, many venues provide offers and discounts to couples getting married during the off-peak season, which could save you several thousands that you can then re-allocate elsewhere.
Getting married during the off-peak season may also reduce the cost of other vendors, like catering and videographers, which may reduce costs elsewhere. Do note, however, that this isn’t necessarily a guarantee. It all depends on the nature of the vendor’s business, plus seasonality and their staffing approach. Read our ultimate guide to saving money on your wedding for more cost-cutting tips.
It can be tempting to host a fairytale wedding at a castle or in a stately home, but these venues are among the most expensive. For example, the cost of a wedding at Cliveden House in Berkshire starts at £36,000. Of course, a wedding here will be stunning, but the budget needed is far higher than the UK average, which means it isn’t a viable option for everyone.
To keep venue costs more budget-friendly but the experience just as luxurious, why not consider an alternative or unique venue? You could consider getting married in a garden, on a sunny beach, or in a countryside hotel. An alternative venue will also ensure your wedding fits your personality and is unique.
For something even more personal , you could alternatively say ‘I do’ in your childhood home or a family property for a sentimental touch. If you have the space, you could even get married in your own back garden. At the end of the day, it’s all about what makes you and your partner happy.
With an all-inclusive wedding venue, you get a location for the ceremony, the wedding breakfast and the reception, as well as catering, seating and table services, all provided by the venue. This way, you won’t need to book multiple vendors, which will typically save you time and money.
Before going for an all-inclusive venue, read their packages thoroughly to make sure it includes everything you want and need, and to make sure it fits within your budget. Check out the all-inclusive packages offered by Best Western Premier Yew Lodge Hotel and Webbington Hotel and Spa to get an idea of how much you could save with an all-inclusive package.
The more rentals you add, the higher the price. This is why you should make use of every resource available. For example, most venues have wedding coordinators on-site. Speak to them about where you can cut back on costs and what facilities they offer for free or at discounted rates.
With an all-inclusive venue, you likely won’t have to pay for linens, chairs, cutlery and tables, so that’s a huge plus point. Additionally, consider the inbuilt lighting and sound systems that may have an impact on what a DJ needs to bring to create the atmosphere you want, or whether they need to be present all day for background music or just for the evening,
Weddings are often pushed back, moved up or postponed for numerous reasons. That means, one of your favourite venues may unexpectedly have availability that they’re going to struggle to fill. So, to fill the availability and not lose money, the venue will likely try to fill it by offering it a massively discounted rate.
If you’re flexible, look for last-minute cancellations at venues within your area. Chances are you’ll be able to secure a luxurious venue that might otherwise not be possible in your budget. Plus, other vendors affected by the cancellation might also offer you a discount, so it’s worth asking.
Here at Bridebook, we have a wide selection of ‘late availability’ offers that mean you could secure your dream venue for a fraction of the cost. To check for last-minute availability, browse our fabulous range of venues and filter by ‘Exclusive Bridebook Offers’. You’re sure to find something you love!
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The average UK salary is £29,588 and when you consider rent/mortgage payments and the ever-increasing cost of living, paying for your upcoming wedding can feel rather daunting.
But don’t panic! We’ve got a super powerful budget tool which uses thousands of couples’ real budgets to estimate the total cost of your wedding and then break that down so you have a good idea of exactly what each part will cost. We also have an in-depth guide to saving money on your wedding which is filled with cost-cutting tips.
But, if you’re looking to do things a little more traditionally, and get generous family members involved, who pays for what in a wedding?
Some families offer to help the newlyweds-to-be celebrate the most magical day of their lives, and we’re here to give you the lowdown on who traditionally (a big emphasis on the traditionally… it is 2023 after all) pays for what. Once you’ve calculated your budget and seen how much everything’s going to cost, you and your partner can both let your families know what they can help with. At the end of the day, it’s whatever works for you and your family.
If you don’t want to know about the whys and hows of these costs and want to get straight into what each side of the family should pay for, skip ahead to our quick reference cheat sheet!
Once upon a time, a bride’s family paid the groom or his family a dowry to help the couple establish their new life as newlyweds. This hasn’t been a part of British culture since the 19th century, but has evolved into the tradition that the bride’s family will stump up for a large portion of the bill when it comes to the wedding itself.
Once again, beliefs and expectations have evolved, and in the 21st century, it’s no longer the case that the bride’s family are expected to pay. Now, in the UK and many cultures around the world, the bride’s family and the groom’s family – as well as the couple themselves – can help pay for a wedding.
But, as revealed by our annual UK Wedding Report, with modern couples generally getting married a little later in life (and therefore having higher-paid jobs and more savings), a third of couples pay for their entire wedding themselves.
That still leaves two-thirds of couples who need a little extra help. So, the modern way to split paying for a wedding looks a little something like this:
Bride’s family – 25%
Groom’s family – 25%
The couple – 50%
With this in mind, based on the average cost of a wedding being £19,184, that still leaves you with close to £10,000 you might have to save yourself – and that’s if your family can lend a hand.
Should you ask the bride’s family to pay for your wedding?
While it may have once been the traditional way to pay for a wedding (particularly among the Georgian upper classes), you should only ask the bride’s family to pay for your wedding if you know they can comfortably afford it. The same goes for asking the groom’s family. You’ll want to make sure they’re fully on board with your marriage plans, which might mean a lot of buttering up and being an exemplary son or daughter and future in-law.
The important thing to remember is not to go in expecting anyone to pay. Talking about money is personal, private and sometimes awkward. But, it can be done carefully without causing friction. For more information, read our guide on how to talk wedding budgets with your parents.
Who traditionally pays for different parts of a wedding in the UK?
If you’re lucky enough to have family who want to help you pay for your wedding, then the below guide should give you an indication of who might pay for what.
Before we dive in, each of these traditions is based on there being a bride and groom. Many modern couples have two grooms or two brides – or perhaps neither. If you’re an LGBTQ+ couple planning your big day, we recommend that you try to evenly split what you ask your families to pay for and use the below as a rough guide.
Who traditionally pays for an engagement party?
This expense is traditionally covered by the bride’s family since they often host the engagement party at their house as a way to welcome and bring together the two families (often for the first time). However, whichever family is feeling the most generous can offer to host or throw the engagement party. It all depends on space, funds and who wants to do the clearing up afterwards.
Who traditionally pays for the rehearsal dinner?
Since the bride’s family pays for the engagement party, the rehearsal dinner is traditionally paid for by the groom’s parents. They should only spend what they’re comfortable with, however, and hosting a small soirée the day before the wedding is more than enough.
In the UK, rehearsal dinners aren’t exactly common, so you may ask for this contribution to go towards the big day itself, instead.
Who traditionally pays for the wedding venue?
The venue is usually the single biggest expenditure of your entire wedding, and no one is pleased to be handed an invoice with that many zeros on it. Traditionally, this would be something that the bride’s parents would pay for and covers the cost of the ceremony itself.
Because the average wedding venue costs between £7,000 and £8,000, this can be a heck of a cost to expect one family to pay for alone. So, for more modern weddings, this is something that many families – together with the couple – split the bill for.
This is another cost that traditionally lies with the bride’s family, which includes the cost of canapés, the breakfast and the evening buffet. The good news is that it’s not traditional for the bride’s parents to cover the cost of an open bar, with most weddings having a cash bar so guests pay for their own drinks.
The bride’s family traditionally pays for the wedding reception, though the costs do cross over with that of the venue, entertainment, decor and food.
Because of this, the more modern take on it is to split the cost between the bride’s and groom’s families, as well as the couple themselves.
Who traditionally pays for wedding transport?
Traditionally, wedding transport is paid for by both families. If you’re hiring transport for your guests, for example, a Big Red Bus, then this isn’t traditionally something your guests will be expected to pay for.
Who traditionally pays for a wedding photographer or videographer?
Your wedding photographer (and/or videographer if you choose to hire one) is traditionally paid for by the bride’s family.
For modern weddings, this might be something that the couple prefers to pay for themselves. Find out more about the cost of a wedding photographer and videographer in our dedicated guides.
Who traditionally pays for wedding flowers?
Traditionally, the groom pays for the bride’s bouquet. For an extra romantic twist, the groom could even pick wildflowers to be included as well. On the other hand, the bride’s side of the family will traditionally pay for all the floral decorations. Read our guide to choosing wedding flowers for more information on the types of flowers you might want at your wedding.
For modern weddings, the flowers are something that the couple will pay for, including the bouquet and floral decorations. Discover how much this might set you back in our post on the cost of wedding flowers.
Who traditionally pays for the wedding cake?
The wedding cake is traditionally paid for by the bride’s family, but this isn’t a tradition stuck to quite as closely as others. Many couples now choose to pay for their own cake, in part due to the traditions involved with cutting the cake and how it represents sharing everything. Learn more about the cost of a wedding cake here.
Who traditionally pays for the wedding dress?
One of the most closely stuck-to traditions is that the bride’s family will pay for the wedding dress. This also includes any accessories the bride may wear, such as a veil, a bag and shoes.
For modern weddings, the bride may want to pay for her own dress. But, the bridal party are still encouraged to attend fittings for all the fun and excitement that goes with it.
The groom’s family would traditionally pay for the groom’s suit and any accessories, such as a tie, shoes and pocket square. Nowadays, it’s more likely to be one of the expenses that the groom will take care of himself.
Traditionally, the cost of the wedding rings is split between the two families. But, wedding rings are super personal – they’re pieces of jewellery the two of you will likely wear all day for the rest of your lives and have a huge amount of meaning. For that reason, many couples choose to pay for their wedding rings themselves these days.
Traditionally, whoever proposes is the one who will pay for the engagement ring. It’s also tradition for the ring to cost the same as one, two or even three month’s salary, but with the average monthly income being £2,466, that would be one heck of a diamond! Another option is to use a family heirloom which has been passed down from parents or grandparents.
Some modern couples will buy an engagement ring together. This might take away the element of surprise when it comes to the proposal itself, but it can be a lot of fun shopping for an engagement ring together. Other couples might choose to wear an engagement ring each, and those who do this might pay for the rings together.
For more information, read our post on how much does an engagement ring cost?
Who traditionally pays for the bridesmaids’ dresses?
The bride’s side of the family traditionally pays for the bridesmaids’ dresses. But, with modern weddings, it’s becoming more common for bridesmaids to pay for their own dresses. It really depends on what your budget is, the type of dresses you want your bridesmaids to wear, and whether or not that’s within their price range. To avoid confusion later, we’d recommend discussing this as early as possible with your wedding squad.
Unless they’ll be matching or require special suits, the ushers traditionally pay for their own attire. If the suits need to be tailor-made, however, it’s an expense that the groom’s side should cover.
Who pays for wedding guests’ accommodation?
Traditionally, each side of the family pays for their own guests’ accommodation. However, this really depends on what the families are comfortable with, as most guests pay for their own accommodation nowadays. Most hotels charge north of £100 a night, and if you decide to cover the bill that could set you back thousands. Thankfully, very few couples offer to pay for their guests’ accommodation, so it’s not something they’ll expect. Just make sure you mention this on your information sheet.
Who traditionally pays for a hen party?
Traditionally, the hens will pay for most aspects of a hen party, with the maid of honour taking the responsibility of arranging everything and making those important bookings.
Today, there are no set rules – it entirely depends on budgets and plans. Make sure you and your hens discuss all your options and what everyone expects early on.
Who traditionally pays for a stag do?
It’s tradition for the groomsmen attending the stag do to pay, but it all depends on budgets and what the planned activities are. For something more expensive, like a trip abroad which might be more expensive, it’s fine to ask the groom to contribute towards costs.
Who traditionally pays for a honeymoon?
Traditionally, it’s the groom who pays for the honeymoon. But, the average honeymoon costs £4,200, so this is no easy feat. Today, however, most couples split the cost, with many also asking for donations towards their honeymoon instead of wedding gifts. This is a relatively new tradition, which likely stems from the fact that people are generally getting married later and often already live together by the time they tie the knot. That means they probably don’t need (or want) a new toaster or a 24-piece dinnerware set!
Traditionally, the groom’s family doesn’t have to pay as many wedding-related costs, but there are still plenty of ways they can get their hands in their pockets:
The groom’s outfit
The best man’s suit and ushers’ outfits (NB. As with the bridesmaids, these now tend to be bought by the groomsmen themselves)
Groom’s going-away outfit
Transportation to the ceremony for the groom and best man
Transportation for the bride and groom from the reception venue
Buttonholes for all the groomsmen
Civil or religious ceremony fees
Church fees (plus any extras like church music and bell ringing)
Registration office and other venue fees
Passports and visas for the honeymoon
Travel and accommodation for the honeymoon
Spending money for the honeymoon
Travel insurance for the honeymoon
Bride’s engagement and wedding rings
Presents for the bridesmaids, ushers and best man
Presents for the bride’s parents
Press announcement for the wedding
Wedding night hotel fees
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While some couples and their families choose to abide by traditions, things are quickly changing, so you shouldn’t feel obliged to stick to any of them. It’s down to you and your family to decide who pays for what, so everyone feels included and no one feels pressured to spend beyond their means. For money-saving tips from the experts, remember to read our ultimate wedding cost-cutting guide.
You’re engaged to your best friend, your partner in crime, your ride or die 
