How To: Invite or Exclude Kids From Your Wedding

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Inviting children to a wedding can be wonderful. For some couples, they add something indescribably sweet to the proceedings, as well as priceless moments that rehearsed entertainment simply can’t offer.  However, for others, children equal crying, tantrums and screaming – and can totally cramp your day’s style.  As well as being the #1 UK Wedding Planning App, we want to be your pocket guide to wedding etiquette, to help you navigate the narrow nuances of invites. So whichever camp you’re in, here is our etiquette guide:

If you are including children:

1) This does not mean that every single child of every guest has to be welcome. You can always choose to have just the children of close relatives and friends, or just the pageboy and flower girl in the ceremony. 

2) Clarify that children are invited in your invitation – address the invite to Mr and Mrs Windsor and George and Lottie. That way there’s no room for misinterpretation.

3) Make sure you organise the children at your wedding: seat the parents and children on the same tables, or have a separate table. Get some activity packs for their place settings to keep them occupied and having fun!

4) Remember to order special meals for them if they require it – you don’t want the oysters wasted on a little munchkin if all they want is a Fruit Shoot and some chicken. With our amazing free Guest List tool, it’s really easy to keep track of them all, who they’re coming with and thus how many meals you need to order in.

If you are not including children:

1) Try to avoid saying “NO SMELLY SCREAMING RUG RATS” on the invite and make a note that ‘Unfortunately children are not invited’ or something along those lines. If someone still RSVP’s with the names of their children, ring them up and politely explain why you chose not to have children at your wedding. They’ll completely understand – and if they don’t, steel yourself for the fact that they may come as a package. If the children aren’t invited, they may not come either.

2) If you know you are inviting couples with young children, give them plenty of warning to organise themselves, especially if they need to hire a babysitter.

3) Consider if you have any nursing mothers on the guest list. Their lovely little ones require different treatment, considering they may not be able to be left at home under someone else’s care. Investigate a nearby room where the baby may be able to be taken to sleep in close proximity to their parents so they’re able to check in regularly, but still enjoy the festivities.

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Happy Planning!

Introduction: Your Wedding Team

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Planning a wedding is super fun but it’s a pretty big deal. There’s a lot to do, which is why we’ve developed these completely free wedding planning tools to help keep on top of everything. On the day, however, you probably don’t want to be checking any screens, you just want to be able to focus on looking mind-blowing for your lover and savour the moments before hand – not thinking about where the napkins should go. To solve this, say hello to your wedding team – they’re in place so that once you reach the big day, you won’t have to think about anything other than you and your beloved. It’s a big role, and it can carry big responsibilities. If you’re having trouble deciding who to pick, here’s our introduction to the necessary crew and our tips on how to pick the best candidates. And yes, it is a job (on top of being an honour, of course)!

The Team:

Maid Of Honour

Best Man

Bridesmaids (number optional)

Ushers (traditionally, one per 50 guests, but flexible)

Ring bearer (optional)

Flower girls (optional)

Both sets of parents

 

Tips On Picking The Team:

1) The most important roles are those of the Maid of Honour and the Best Man – they are your rocks. They tend to be the closest people to the bride and groom, and hopefully the most responsible and organised. They will be required to help out with any number of tasks – but mainly to provide emotional support for the couple and be the point of contact on the wedding day. Why not take them out for a nice dinner and ask them properly – like another proposal!

2) Your Maid of Honour is, most likely, your closest friend, your wingwoman. Not only does she need to be organised and reliable, but most importantly you’re going to need her when things get emotional or overwhelming –and someone needs to pass you the tissues. She probably knows you better than anyone, so will know exactly what to do and always have your back.

3) When choosing your Best Man, think about him doing the speech! While we all know his banter is the comedy highlight of the pub on a Friday night, it may not be as hilarious in front of granny! We advise the BM reads our guide to a successful speech here – then obviously he will nail it! Nowadays some grooms choose two Best Men – one for the speech giving and organising, and another too naughty for either of those responsibilities. And who says your Maid of Honour couldn’t do a speech too? 

4) Don’t feel that you have to only have women for bridesmaids and men for ushers. It’s all about who supports you the most, and that knows no gender – increasingly, wedding parties are having bridesmen and groomswomen and they look awesome!

5) Make sure you choose people who will understand their duties and what is expected of them. If they think they’re just in it to wear a pretty dress and sashay down the aisle, they may be mistaken! Dedicate time to brief them properly in advance of the wedding and address any queries that they might have. Once you’re all clear on what’s expected, make sure you go through your suppliers and let them know who to talk to on the day should there be any issues. With their help everything will run smoothly and they can hit the party extra hard knowing they did their bit for their best friends!

6) It’s a nice idea to get all of the wedding party together before the big day. Crack open the bubbly, make sure everyone is introduced and they’ll be best friends in no time. Keep an eye on the ushers around the bridesmaids and look forward to one helluva party!

Happy Planning!