Tag: Ceremony

Discover all you need to know about crafting a meaningful and personalised wedding ceremony that fits your preferences and beliefs.

Introduction: Your Wedding Legalities

bridebook.co.uk your wedding legalities

Marriage ceremonies can come in so many different and amazing forms. Whether it’s at a temple, mosque, synagogue, church or a registry office, a marriage partnership is one of the oldest traditions in many cultures. It can be difficult knowing exactly which wedding legalities each ceremony requires, both in terms of legal documents and religious proceedings. 

We’re here to help with all those tiny details so that whichever ceremony you choose goes flawlessly. You can even filter our massive venue directory search to only include venues that have a license.

Good, huh?

 

For Civil Ceremonies:

The first step you have to take for a civil ceremony is giving notice. You should give notice at least 28 days before the marriage is due to take place. If you live in a different location to where the ceremony will occur, you are also expected to notify the local register. The notice needs to be given by the couple in person.

For a civil ceremony, you will also want to make sure that the venue where you choose to get married is licensed to register marriages. Most venues that host weddings are properly licensed, but it is worth checking with them just in case! You will want to make sure the person marrying you is also properly authorised and that you have two competent witnesses who will sign the marriage register.

 

For Religious Ceremonies:

 

Church of England ceremonies

All British citizens have the option of getting married in the Church of England, providing the church is local to where they are registered. Otherwise, it needs to be the couple’s chosen place of worship or the bride and groom must be listed on the church’s electoral poll.

Although new same-sex marriage legislation is now in force, it remains the case that it is not legally possible for same-sex couples to marry in the Church of England. Exceptions to these rules can be made if you speak directly to the religious authority presiding in the church, who will be more than happy to help you with any of your queries. 

To get married in a church you must partake in the reading of the banns – basically a public announcement of your upcoming marriage! The banns are read on three consecutive Sundays within three months in the run-up to the wedding (the banns aren’t a requirement in Scotland). The couple should try to attend at least one of the readings and sometimes a number of Sunday services. 

More information can be found here: http://www.yourchurchwedding.org/

 

Roman Catholic ceremonies

For a Roman Catholic ceremony, you will need to bring your baptism and confirmation certificates to the meeting with your priest, at least six months before the ceremony. If one of you is unbaptised, you will need to seek permission from your chosen Church and the priest. You may sometimes be required to attend marriage preparation talks and Mass for six weeks before your wedding day.

 

Jewish and Quaker ceremonies

While you still need to give notice to the register office a minimum of 28 days prior to the ceremony, the officials performing the ceremony will be able to register the marriage for you.

 

All other religious ceremonies

For all other religious ceremonies, we advise you to contact your place of worship for information, as they will be able to advise you if you require a superintendent registrar to be present at your wedding or if the ministers or priests can register the marriage for you. If you do need a superintendent registrar to register your marriage, you should book them as soon as possible, as they will have to be present at your ceremony.  You will be required to give the 28-day notice at your local register office.

 

Additional Details:

Documentation

Once you have given notice (at least 28 days before the wedding), forms will be sent to you for you to fill in. You should include all relevant documentation, like birth certificates, death certificates and divorce certificates for those widowed/divorced, as well as proof of identity and nationality.

 

Time

In England, marriages used to be limited to the times between 8 a.m. and 6 p.m., excluding Muslim and Jewish weddings. However, the law has been changed and it is possible to get married at a later time, but we do strongly advise you check with your venue, as some will still have time limitations.

 

Payments

You and your partner will each be required to pay £35 when giving notice. You will need to pay £45 if you have the ceremony at a registry office and more at other venues. The marriage certificate will cost you £4 on the day of the wedding and £10 after.

 

Wedding Insurance

Insurance is a wedding essential you should really not forget about. As soon as you establish a budget, start shopping around for insurance, it can realistically cost you anything between £20-£200. It will cover you in most eventualities, so nothing can deter you from having the best day of your life.

 

Immigration

If you or your partner is subject to immigration laws, there may be other legalities for you to consider and we recommend you seek advice from https://www.gov.uk/marriages-civil-partnerships/religious-ceremonies.

 

Useful Contacts for Religious Ceremonies:

Baptist Union: 01235517700; baptist.org.uk

British Humanist Association: 02070793580; humanism.org.uk

Catholic Church: 02079014863; catholicchurch.org.uk

Catholic Marriage Care: 02073711341, marriagecare.org.uk

Church of England: 02078981000, cofe.anglican.org

Church of England Faculty Office: 02072225381; facultyoffice.org.uk

Church of Scotland: 01312255722; churchofscotland.org.uk

General Register Office for England and Wales: 08456037788, direct.gov.uk

General Register Office for Scotland: 01313144447; gro-scotland.gov.uk

Greek Orthodox Archdiocese: 02077234787; thyateira.org.uk

Humanist Society of Scotland: 08708749002; humanism-scotland.org.uk

Jewish Marriage Council: 02082036311, jmc-uk.org

The Methodist Church: 02074865502; methodist.org.uk

The United Reformed Church: 02079162020, urc.org.uk

Happy Planning!

 

If you enjoyed that article, here a few we suggest: 

Tips To The Groom: Writing Your Wedding Speech

8 Things To Do Now That You’re Engaged 

The Easiest and Smartest Way to Send Your Save the Dates

 

How To Make A Big Wedding Feel Intimate

When you picture an “intimate wedding”, you might think of celebrations with under thirty guests or so. And, of course, the shorter the guest list, the easier it is for a wedding to feel intimate – but that doesn’t mean big weddings can’t too! With a bit of forward planning, any wedding can. Read on to find out our top tips for making a big wedding feel intimate and personal.

1. Host A Pre-Wedding Dinner

If you’ve got a long guest list, it’s likely that there are discrete groups within it. So why not host a “get to know you dinner” a few days or weeks before your wedding? It’ll give your guests a chance to mingle and get to know each other in advance.

2. Create Small Spaces

Divide your venue into smaller spaces so your guests never feel lost in the crowd. Floral installations, drapes and decorations can all be used to create alcoves and hideaways where smaller groups can mingle and chat.

3. Let’s Talk Tables

It might sound counterintuitive but consider opting for fewer, long, rectangular tables instead of lots of smaller round ones. It creates a more relaxed atmosphere and people will be able to chat more easily with a wider range of people.

4. Get The Light Right

Soft, subtle lighting creates a cosy atmosphere that instantly makes any location feel more intimate. Think flickering candles and romantic fairylights.

5. Consider Colour

Choosing a wedding theme based around darker colours is an easy way to make a large space feel cosy and intimate.

6. Circle Around

Even if you have a truly astronomical number of guests, arranging them in a circle will make the back row feel much less far back.

7. Make An Effort

Great all your guests personally and make it a priority to speak with as many people as possible over the course of the day. Even if it’s only a few minutes, they’ll appreciate you taking the time to make them feel welcome.

8. Get Personal

If you have a particularly extensive guest list, talking to everyone might not be possible – and that’s when adding personal touches really comes into its own. Consider writing each guest a handwritten note or gifting them a handmade wedding favour. That way, even if you haven’t managed to speak to them, they’ll still know you cared they came.

9. Consider Staffing

If you have plenty of guests, make sure you have plenty of staff to match! If you can’t make it round everybody, you can at least know they’re being attended to and feeling well looked after.

So there you have it: nine ways to make a big wedding feel intimate. Now, with all those guests to look after, why not add them to your Bridebook’s Guest List? Or if you’re still on the hunt for your dream venue, check out our Venue Search Tool to browse the UK’s biggest (and best!) wedding venue directory.

You Might Also Like…

#WeddingHashtags

Deciding between ‘boho chic’ or ‘classic romance’ can be a hard enough decision when it comes to wedding planning. However, couples nowadays are faced with a much bigger conundrum: The Wedding Hashtag! Over 55% of couples incorporate a hashtag into their big day, so here’s how to choose yours.

 

Bridebook.co.uk wedding hashtag

Be Unique

The last thing you want is for the photos of your big day to get mixed in with someone else’s. Make sure to check the social-sphere to check it hasn’t already been taken.

 

Throw It Out There

Once you have decided on the perfect hashtag make sure to ‘announce it to the world’! Include it on the save the dates, invitations or even cocktail napkins so everyone can get tagging and tweeting those photos!

 

Include Both Your Names

Get brainstorming with those ideas. Whether you want to include your first, last or nick names, write them all down to get those creative juices flowing. If you’re really struggling you can opt to use a wedding hash tag generator… yes, these things do exist. Wedding Hash Tag Wall is a popular one.

 

Make It Short and Sweet

Don’t make it too complicated. Steer clear of words that can be easily misspelled. If guests are confused and not sure what it is they are likely to use the wrong one AKA: bride’s worst nightmare.

 

Happy Hashtagging! 

What hashtag have you decided on for your big day? Leave a comment below. 

And while you are busy having your wedding photos taken? Have a read of ways to entertain your wedding guests.  

 

How To Keep Calm On Your W-Day

At Bridebook, we get that your W-Day can be a bit full on – with all the excitement, the adrenaline, the nerves and all the people around you. But it’s the biggest party of your life so enjoy it! Things might take longer than you planned, delays might occur but take deep breaths and don’t stress out. Here are our top tips to make sure you don’t lose your cool on your big day:

1) Hire professionals

This is especially true for wedding hair and make-up. You don’t want to do your own make-up with shaking fingers. We suggest you choose a spacious room, with plenty of natural light and not too many people in it, to sit back, relax and feel pampered. Grooms, this means you too! Avoid trying to shave with nervous hands and giving yourself a cut, splurge on a wet shave instead. It shouldn’t just be the girls pampering themselves.

2) Prepare in advance

Pack everything you will need on the morning of your wedding, in advance. Follow our list, that way you are guaranteed not to forget anything. We also suggest you take all the packaging off any recent purchases, because shopping bags can clutter the space and create a sense of chaos, especially as things you need tend to disappear inside them. Get everything ready, make it look pretty and enjoy the calm!

Bridebook.co.uk- bride putting on shoes in bridal suite
By Guy Hearn

3) Don’t forget to eat

Yes, you probably won’t feel hungry, but trust us, eating something is a must. You don’t want to faint down the aisle or be drunk for your reception! Secret tip: we recommend you have some eggs. They won’t make you bloat and you will feel full for hours.

4) Get dressed

Leave time to get into your wedding dress. It will take your mum and bridesmaids longer to lace and button than it took the professional at the final fitting. Aim to get dressed half an hour before you are due to leave. Then you can enjoy spending time with your family and get used to twirling around in the dress.

Bridebook.co.uk- wedding breakfast laid out
By Richard Skins Photography

5) Prepare your wedding car

Just in case the driver doesn’t know where to go, give him the exact wedding location. If you happen to break down – don’t panic – make sure someone with you has a taxi number to hand. Drama diverted!

6) Picture perfect

Make sure you get all the photos you want on your wedding day! Prepare an order sheet of the shots you need and make sure that everyone knows where they are supposed to be for the pictures. Then you can follow your list without having to think about anything and just have fun!

Bridebook.co.uk- mother and bride hugging
By John Lennie

7) Don’t do any last minute DIY

If any has to be done on the day itself, enlist helpers. Your brain will be in party mode!

8) Relax and enjoy!

Try to relax. Everything is sorted and ready to go, so just enjoy it! Everyone is there to help you. You’re going to look amazing and you’re marrying the love of your life – dreamy!

Bridebook.co.uk- bride and groom taking selfie at the back of wedding car
By Lawson Photography

9) Leave your phone

People probably won’t be calling you on your wedding day, but if they do, pass your phone to the MOH or the BM and they can answer any questions.

10) Drinks

If you decide to have a little drink before the ceremony, don’t over-do it. Grooms, try a half-pint, instead of a full one – you don’t want to be saying your vows and secretly dying for the bathroom!

Bridebook.co.uk- bride and groom hugging with the sun shining
By Miki Photography

Happy Planning!

Tips: Bridal SOS Kit

Bridebook.co.uk- bridal purse perfume hair grip and garter laid out
By Ten Twenty One

Your wedding day has arrived! POP open the champagne because today is going to be the best day of your life! To make sure you have everything you need, here are some bits and bobs you might want to whip together – get your Maid of Honour, AKA the superhero, to hang onto them so you don’t have to.

Basic:

  • Band-Aids
  • Cash
  • Comb
  • Clear nail varnish (goodbye laddered tights or buttons that are about to fall off)
  • Extra earring backs
  • Hair Pins (try bringing brown and black, so you can work with a variety of hair colours)
  • Hairspray
  • Makeup – cover up, lipstick and anything else you might want to touch up
  • Lighter (if a hem is showing a bit of loose thread or if any candles need re-lighting)
  • Mints (fresh breath is always a good idea, especially if you had your favourite garlic bread for lunch)
  • Mobile phone
  • Nail file
  • Paracetamol
  • Perfume
  • Q Tips
  • Safety Pins
  • A small sewing kit
  • Small phone charger
  • Stain remover
  • Straws (especially if you are sporting your signature lipstick and don’t want it to smudge!)
  • Tissues, because (happy) tears are likely!
  • Water bottle

 

Bridebook.co.uk- flower crown wedding accessory
By Richard Skins Photography

 

Pack travel-sized versions of everything and it won’t seem like that much. Summer or winter wedding? Here are some more ideas depending on when you choose to celebrate.

Spring/Summer:

  • Baby powder. A bit of baby powder will stop your arms chafing against your dress. You’ll be chafe free when rocking the dance floor later too.

 

  • Important for an outdoor wedding, and an indoor one, if photos are outside – opt for scent-free. Then it’s already packed for the honeymoon.

 

  • Bug spray. Depending on the location – but around dusk, bugs can become incredibly active and protection becomes necessary (again opt for scent-free).

 

Bridebook.co.uk- bridal emergency kit lying on the bed
By Ten Twenty One

Autumn/Winter:

  • Lip Balm is a major necessity, especially in the winter months, when lips start chapping.

 

  • Hand Cream. Cold air dries the skin on your hands. So if you’re not wearing gloves, get those babies moisturised.

 

  • Anti-static spray. If you are changing in and out of warmer clothes, the spray will stop the static.

 

bridebook.co.uk brides and groom showered in confetti
By Raw Silk Photography

 Happy Planning!

7 Tips To Weather-Proof Your Wedding

As your W-Day draws closer and closer, you might start checking the weather forecast. But WHO CARES… your wedding day is the best day of your life whatever the weather. So let’s just make sure you’re excited and prepared for any wind, rain, snow – because all of them can make your wedding  day even better than you could possibly imagine. So enjoy!

Bridebook.co.uk- bride wearing a pair of white weddingtons
By Ross Harvey

1) Consider your venue

The simplest rule is to always make sure you have a marquee or venue big enough to fit everyone inside. So long as guests are warm and dry, they will have an awesome time so simply plan for that. For marquees, make sure it has sides that can be pulled down if it is a little windy, so you can really get that party started.  Sorted!

Bridebook.co.uk- umbrella favours for guests
By Cinzia Bruschini

2) Brollies and Wellies

“Every cloud has a silver lining.” If rain is expected, embrace it! Why not get guests to bring a pair of wellies? Or if you have a little budget to spare, give them multi-coloured wellies as favours (you can find cheap ones online) – you could even ask their shoe size on the invite. Or have your names and the wedding date drawn on brightly coloured brollies for people to take away with them, et voila! Imagine your whole guest list in wellies and brollies – the pictures will look amazing! Oh and ladies, keep yourselves (and your stunning shoes) from sinking into the wet ground with heelstoppers!

 

Bridebook.co.uk- bride and groom kissing under multicoloured umbrella
By Chris Giles Photography

3) Dark skies are superb for photographers

Photographers LOVE a stormy sky. It makes for amazing lighting, so enjoy creative and unique wedding photos! A little wind will make the billowing veil look incredible, snow will make everything much more intimate and cosy, while raindrops look amazing in photos. Go outside, dance around, laugh and stay happy, you’ve just married your best friend!

 

Bridebook.co.uk- bride and groom in outdoor ceremony under umbrellas
By Allister Freeman

4) Cross fingers for snow

If you are lucky enough to have a winter wedding AND it happens to snow then definitely embrace it! Think of all the possibilities: you could wear a stunning fur coat, you can cosy up to your beloved in the middle of a snowy field… And think about the photos; your wedding will look like a fairy tale!

Bridebook.co.uk- bride and groom kissing in front of skiis
By David Pullum Photography

5) Hot or Cold?

Your wedding day is set to be scorcher – picture the sun shining and drinks flowing. Just make sure there’s lots of water kicking about and maybe turn your wedding programme into a fan – just so you’re looking out for those guys in morning suits and elderly relatives. Everyone will be happy so you can get back to your party in the beautiful sunshine.

If the temperature is looking a little cold for your big day, you can easily rent an extra heater even a week to go before the wedding so there’s nothing to worry about. Everyone is going to be so hot from dancing they won’t notice anyway. It just means people will party harder!

 

Bridebook.co.uk- bridesmaids in faux fur covers
By Richard Skins Photography

6) Ask the ushers for help

That’s what they are there for! Get the ushers to shelter you with an umbrella as you go into and leave the ceremony. And if you arrange for them to have towels, they can even give the aisle a quick wipe down ready for your entrance = flawless dress. Bonus.

 

Bridebook.co.uk- groom and ushers standing on a hill against the sky
By Ross Harvey

7) Now go and have fun!

Final tip: don’t worry about the beautiful white dress and the smart suit – they can always be cleaned. This is the biggest party of your life so go and have fun; your guests are definitely going to – rain, snow, wind or shine!

 

Bridebook.co.uk- bride and groom standing under white umbrella
By Anna Clarke Photography

Happy Planning!

Bridebook’s 10 Favourite Wedding Traditions

Bridebook.co.uk- phillipa lepley gown with blue bow sewn in
By Chris Giles Photography

1. Something Old, Something New…

Everyone knows that there are four must-haves for your wedding: something old, something new, something borrowed and something blue. Traditionally, these have been carried by the bride (along with a silver sixpence in her shoe!) but we love seeing anybody take up this tradition. The something old represents the past, while the something new symbolises the couple’s bright future together. The something borrowed should be from a happily married friend or relative, in the hope that their good fortune will rub off on this couple! Finally, the something blue is connected to ideas of fidelity and love.

Bridebook.co.uk- something old borrowed new and blue
By Chris Giles Photography

2. The Wedding Veil

This tradition originated in Ancient Rome, where brides used their wedding veil to hide from evil spirits who envied and wanted to steal her newly wedded bliss. Scary stuff! (For help choosing your veil – whether you’re fearful of spirits or not! – check out this article.)

3. A Rainy Wedding

Rain, rain, go away? Not at all! Rain on a wedding day is believed to symbolise fertility. According to Hinduism, it’s also good luck. Plus, it makes for fab photos – so get your wellies on!

4. The Threshold

The tradition of the groom carrying the bride over the threshold originated in Medieval Europe. It was believed that the bride was extra vulnerable to evil spirits through the soles of her feet! Not hard to believe if she’d spent the whole day in heels… Nowadays, we love this super cute tradition for any couple, not just ones made up of a bride and groom.

Bridebook.co.uk- bride tearing up
By Jamie Bott Wedding Photography

5. Tears of Joy

Feeling teary on your wedding day? Don’t worry – it’s a good thing! If a bride cries on her wedding day, it’s believed that she will have used up all her tears for years to come, meaning she’s looking forward to a very happy marriage. We reckon this goes for anyone getting married, not just the brides! So our advice? If you’re wearing mascara, make it waterproof…

6. The Garter Toss

Believe it or not, there’s actually a meaning to the garter toss. In France, it used to be believed that the bride’s dress carried good luck. Unfortunately, this meant everyone wanted a piece of it! To stop the crowd rushing towards the bride to rip off pieces of her dress, some bright spark decided to distract them by throwing a garter. It worked a treat – and it’s stuck around since!

Bridebook.co.uk- groom lifting bride as guests applaud
By Allister Freeman

7. The Honeymoon 

Did you know the honeymoon wasn’t always a fancy holiday? The idea of the honeymoon actually originated from the (thankfully!) long-abandoned practice of grooms abducting their brides. Over the decades, this turned into a tradition where the newlyweds would hide away for thirty (yes, thirty!) days. That’s one month or the length of the lunar cycle – so that’s where we get the “moon”! On each day, a close relation would bring them honeyed wine – and that’s where “honey” comes from. Anyone still up for a honeymoon like that?!

8. Decorating the Wedding Car

Does tying cans to your wedding car seem like a silly idea to you? Well, it didn’t to French gentlemen a few centuries ago! They punished the groom for taking a single girl “off the market” by waking him up in the middle of the night and demanding he repay them with a feast.

Bridebook.co.uk- wedding rings and engagement ring on top of pink flowers
By Chris Giles Photography

9. Wedding Rings

Ever wondered why we wear wedding rings? And why do we wear them on the fourth finger of our left hands in the UK? Well, this tradition comes from the romantic Romans. They believed that a vein ran directly from this finger to the heart – and the ring’s circle symbolises eternal love!

10. The Best Man

Bridebook.co.uk- groom and best man hug before the ceremony
By Allister Freeman

Believe it or not, the best man has been around for a while – even if they weren’t quite the speech giver they are today! This tradition originated in Anglo-Saxon times. Back then, the groom abducted his bride – so to defend himself from the bride’s family, he took his closest (and strongest) friend as a partner in crime!

You might also like…

Everything You Need to Know about Flower Girls

Little girls wearing the most adorable dresses while walking down the aisle with flowers on their heads can be a super cute addition to your wedding ceremony. So if you or your beloved have a daughter or maybe some adorable nieces or younger cousins, we’re sure you’ve thought about including them in your wedding party as a flower girl. While we all know a flower girl should look sweet, what do you need to think about to make sure your flower girl is cute and up for the job?

In this post, we’re going to look at everything you need to know when it comes to flower girls, including what they do, how old they are and whether or not you need to have one at your wedding.

What are flower girls?

Photo © Emd Media Photography and Videography | See their Bridebook profile

Flower girls have been a common role at weddings dating back to ancient Rome, when young girls would carry bunches of wheat and scatter herbs down the aisle before the bride joined the groom at the altar. This was a symbolic gesture to wish the couple good luck in their life as they looked to start a family.

This has evolved over time, but only slightly. During medieval times, flower girls would ward off sinister spirits by carrying garlic. Only during the Victorian era did flower girls start to resemble those of modern times, becoming part of the bridal party to carry and scatter flowers and petals. While what the flower girl carries has changed over time, it continues to symbolise good luck and fertility – for those looking to start a family, of course.

What does a flower girl do at a wedding?

Photo © Tobiah Tayo | See their Bridebook profile

A flower girl is usually the daughter of a friend or relative, and is someone happy to play a part in your wedding. The flower girl will walk down the aisle, after the bridesmaids but before the bride, holding a basket of rose or other flower petals, which they’ll scatter on the floor. They will then either stand with the rest of the bridal party, or rejoin their parents to sit and watch the rest of the ceremony.

Some flower girls may also be given bubbles to add an extra touch of magic. This is particularly beautiful if you have two or more flower girls, with one scattering petals while the other blows bubbles. 

How do you choose a flower girl?

Photo © Grace Nicole Photography | See their Bridebook profile

A flower girl is often someone who’s close to you, such as a younger sister, niece, cousin, or daughter of a close friend.

Sometimes it will be an obvious choice. But, if you’re part of a large family, and have more than one potential flower girl, don’t panic, this will only work in your favour. It can be a little overwhelming for one flower girl to be the centre of attention, especially if she’s very young or shy. This is why it’s nice to have a pair of flower girls, so that they can look after one another and help each other with their duties. Besides, if there’s a little group of flower girls, they’re guaranteed to have more fun and look extra cute as they walk down the aisle in their gorgeous dresses.

How old can a flower girl be for a wedding?

Photo © Jane Ball Photography | See their Bridebook profile

Traditionally, a flower girl is somewhere between the ages of four and nine. Any younger and they might find your wedding a challenge and any older and they’re more likely to be promoted to junior bridesmaid. 

Do you need a flower girl at your wedding?

Photo © Steve Ayres Photography | See their Bridebook profile

Flower girls are frequently seen at weddings around the world. It’s a great way to involve younger guests in your wedding, as well as to introduce the bride. But, if you don’t have any girls under nine in your family or friends circle, you’re hosting an intimate wedding or you simply don’t want a flower girl, then it’s not something you should feel obliged to include. While having a flower girl at your wedding is a cute addition, it’s not something that will impact your big day in any way should you not have one.

How many flower girls can you have at your wedding?

Photo © Katy Brothers Wedding Photography | See their Bridebook profile

The traditional number of flower girls to have at your wedding is one, but it’s becoming increasingly more common to have two or even three. Basically, if you have several cute contenders and you can’t decide who gets the part, you can have as many flower girls as you like. That being said, you might want to avoid things getting out of hand if you have too many, so it’s probably best to stick to a smaller number. If there are older girls in your family and you’d love for them to be a part of your wedding, why not ask them to be a bridesmaid instead?

What is the flower girl etiquette?

Photo © Tim Elwood | See their Bridebook profile

Flower girls may not play a large or key role in your wedding, but it’s still important and requires them to follow a few simple rules. So, your chosen flower girl will need to follow a few guidelines so you can be confident everything goes to plan, such as:

  • They’re happy to have attention on them from admirers at your wedding, including during the ceremony as they walk down the aisle.
  • They can follow instructions and are happy being told what to do.
  • They can attend any rehearsals you might have.
  • They’re enthusiastic and excited to play a part in your big day.
  • They can be on time and well-behaved.

They’ll also need to be happy to be included in the customary photo shoot, which usually requires a little more patience than it does for other guests, as the wedding party invariably are usually featured in more photographs.

What does a flower girl do on the morning of the wedding?

Photo © Jervis Wedding Photography | See their Bridebook profile

On the morning of the big day, it’s common for the flower girl to get ready with the rest of the bridal party. It’s a great way to help your flower girl feel included and a big part of your special day. This does depend on your relationship with the flower girl and if she’s old enough and has enough confidence to spend time away from her parents (unless she has other relatives, such as her mum, who are also part of the bridal party).

If your flower girl can’t get ready with the rest of the bridal party, then ask her parents to arrive at the venue in plenty of time to make sure they’re happy and settled before their big moment.

Do flower girls walk down the aisle before the bride (and bridesmaids)?

Photo © Mark Battista Photography | See their Bridebook profile

Yes, the flower girl usually walks down the aisle before the bride, but after the bridesmaids, maid of honour, page boy and ring bearer.

How do you prepare your flower girl?

Photo © Lemon Feather Photography | See their Bridebook profile

As the youngest (and most adorable) members of your wedding party, your flower girls may not fully understand what’s expected of them on your wedding day or why it’s such an important role in your wedding. A nice way to get your flower girls excited ahead of the big day is to present them with a children’s book about flower girls (this is one of our favourites). This way, you’re giving their parents an opportunity to fully explain what’s required of them on the day of the wedding, to calm them if they’re feeling nervous and make them feel special. After all, if a book is written about their role, it must be important!

Another nice idea is to organise a lunch with all the flower girls before the big day. That way everyone can become besties beforehand and you can talk them through what they have to do.

On the day itself, it’s a good idea to allocate one of your bridesmaids to look after them and make sure they walk at the right time, know where to sit and feel happy about what they’re doing.

How do you dress your flower girl?

Photo © Winnington and Coe | See their Bridebook profile

Traditionally, a flower girl’s dress has to strike a perfect balance between the bride’s and bridesmaids’ dresses. The majority of flower girl dresses have the long puffy skirt silhouette with a high neck, with or without sleeves, depending on the weather. While the long skirts look absolutely lovely and make the flower girls feel like princesses, make sure you choose carefully so they don’t trip as they make their way up the aisle. We also find that while the majority of dresses are white, they will have a sash, or another small pop of colour, that ties them together with the bridal party.

Can your flower girls match the bridesmaids?

Photo © Lewis Horsley Wedding Photography | See their Bridebook profile

If you’d like your flower girls to look less like the bride and wear a dress similar or identical to that of your bridesmaids, then you can absolutely do this. Not only will this look beautiful, but your flower girls will love wearing the same dress as other members of the bridal party. 

Who buys the flower girl dress?

Photo © Teri V Photography | See their Bridebook profile

Traditionally, the mother of the flower girl pays for the dress, while the couple or the bride’s parents (whoever is footing the bill) cover the cost of the flowers, basket and anything else the flower girl might need.

However, this all depends on your budget. These days, more and more couples are paying for their own wedding. For more information, read our post on who traditionally pays for what at a wedding.

Do you buy the flower girl a gift?

Photo © 1st Class Wedding Photography & Videography | See their Bridebook profile

In a similar way to how you might give your bridesmaids a token gift to show your appreciation for being a part of your wedding, you may also want to do the same for your flower girls. It’s by no means a requirement, but it’s a kind and thoughtful gesture that shows your flower girls how much it means to you that they were there to play a role in your special day.

A gift for your flower girls doesn’t need to be anything big or expensive. A small toy, a book, or a teddy bear is more than enough so it doesn’t need to add too much to your wedding budget.

5 tips for a successful flower girl experience

Photo © Alexa Poppe Wedding & Event Photography | See their Bridebook profile

If you’re excited to ask one of the little girls in your life to be a flower girl at your wedding, bear in mind the following five tips to make sure everything is as close to perfect as it can be.

  1. Don’t ask more than two or three girls to be flower girls at your wedding. Any more and it might be difficult to get them to do what you need them to do. Plus, the more flower girls you have, the more they’re likely to get up to mischief.
  2. Be as open and honest as possible with your flower girls, and invite them to make decisions so they feel part of your day. They’re probably used to being told what to do, but they’ll be far more enthusiastic if they feel empowered by being allowed to make some decisions, no matter how small they might be.
  3. Make sure you order the dresses as close to the wedding date as possible, as children grow exceptionally quickly! The shop assistants will be able to help you, as they have years of experience in this. Be prepared to go up a size from the girl’s current age when ordering, to make sure the dresses won’t be too small once the big day arrives.
  4. Make sure that the dress design you choose is a practical and comfortable one. Kids run around, fidget and generally don’t have the patience for restrictive designs, so prevent any tantrums ahead of time and think cute but comfortable.
  5. Instead of (or as well as) a book, some brides give a piece of jewellery or a small gift to the little ones to say thank you for being part of the wedding. Obviously, they love this and feel very important!

Plan your dream wedding with Bridebook

Sign up to Bridebook today and you’ll get access to all the tools and resources you could need to plan your perfect wedding.

Browse other similar articles…

Happy Planning!