So, it’s all over. All the months of planning, fitting, and crafting have come to an end. You’ve had your photographs back, your honeymoon was a dream, and you’ve made memories to last a lifetime. It can’t all be finished, surely?
Good news — it doesn’t have to be! There are still lovely wedding thank you cards to send. Wedding thank you cards are a great way to express your thanks and re-live the magic of your special day. But here’s the tricky part — who gets one?
In this post, we explore who you should send a thank you note to, whether you should send one to someone who didn’t attend the wedding, and look at some wedding card etiquette. Ready to start? Let’s jump in!
What is a wedding thank you card?
A wedding thank you card is a card given by the happy couple to their guests after the big day. It can be used to express gratitude for a wedding gift, for a cash gift, for their efforts in wedding planning, or simply for their attendance at the wedding.
Wedding thank you cards aren’t only a polite gesture but also a way to show how much the couple values the presence and contributions of their guests. These cards may include a personal message, a photo from the wedding, or other special touches to make the thank you more personal and memorable.
Who should I send wedding thank you cards to?
You should send wedding thank you cards to the following people:
Your wedding party members
Your wedding party members are anyone who played a significant role in your wedding day. For example, the maid of honour, best man, bridesmaids, and groomsmen. You should thank them for their efforts in wedding planning, their unwavering support, and the countless memorable moments they created throughout the journey.
If you’re stuck on what to say, try the following example:
- We are so grateful to you for being part of our special day. We know how much work it’s been, and can’t thank you for standing by our side and supporting us on our special day. From the bottom of our hearts, thank you.
Your parents
Your parents will no doubt have also played a big part in your wedding planning. If you’re lucky, they may have also paid a portion of the bill! It’s good manners to send them a card to acknowledge their efforts and support. Try using the following example:
- Thank you so much for all your help in wedding planning and for all your guidance throughout our relationship. We couldn’t be more grateful for all your support.
- We couldn’t have asked for better parents, and your love and support have meant the world to us, especially on our big day. Your involvement in our wedding planning and your generous contributions are much appreciated. We couldn’t have done it without you!
Wedding suppliers
It’s also nice to send a card to your wedding suppliers and wedding organisers. They hardly ever get thank you cards, and you couldn’t have put the big day together without them! Keep it short and sweet, but let them know how much you appreciate their professionalism and hard work on the big day. For example:
- We wanted to take a moment to express our gratitude for your hard work on our wedding day. Your expertise and dedication made our day run seamlessly, and we couldn’t have asked for better support.
- Thank you so much for all your hard work on our special day. Our wedding was a dream come true, and your contribution played a significant part in that. From the bottom of our hearts, thank you.
People who bought a gift from your registry
It’s good manners to thank the people who bought a gift from your registry. Be sure to thank them specifically for the gift, and include a short anecdote about what you’ve done with the gift. For example:
- Thank you so much for the beautiful vase. We’ve popped it on the coffee table where we can see it every day!
- Thank you for the gorgeous soft towels. I’m looking forward to my next bath so I can snuggle up in their fluff!
People who gave you money
Money is always appreciated when you’re starting out as newlyweds, and those generous souls who gifted you with cash deserve a special mention in your thank you cards. Let them know how grateful you are for their gift and what you intend to put the money towards. For example:
- We were blown away by your generosity in our wedding card. Thank you so much. We’ll be putting the money towards our honeymoon. We’ll be sure to send you lots of pictures!
- Thank you for the generous gift on the big day. We’ll be putting it towards our house deposit so we can have a fresh start as a married couple.
People who gave you an unfamiliar wedding gift
Buying gifts that weren’t on the registry is becoming more and more common. Although unexpected, these gifts can add an extra layer of excitement to the gift-opening experience.
Make a special effort to thank those who went ‘off-book’ for their creativity and consideration when buying your gift. Don’t mention that you weren’t expecting it. Instead, just thank them for their generosity. For example:
- Thank you so much for your beautiful wedding gift. We don’t have an air fryer, and we’ve heard a lot about them, so we’re really excited to try it out!
- Thank you so much for the beautiful painting you made us. We’re so grateful you took so much time to make us this gift, and we know it’ll look beautiful in the living room!
People who shared in a group wedding gift
Shared wedding gifts are a great way to keep down the cost of large or extravagant gifts. When thanking someone for a shared wedding gift, you should acknowledge the part they played in selecting the gift and the effort that clearly went into organising its purchase. For example:
- I was blown away when I opened the beautiful gift from you, Jamie, and Sophie. I can’t believe you all took the time to get together and buy this beautiful statue for us. Thank you so much for your efforts; we really appreciate it!
People who got you a gift you don’t love or will exchange
If someone has given you a gift that isn’t to your taste or that you might exchange, the best advice is to handle it with kindness and understanding. After all, gift-giving is all about spreading love and joy, and sometimes, personal tastes can be as unique as the gifts themselves.
So, first and foremost, take a moment to appreciate the thought and effort behind the gift. Remember — it’s the thought that counts. There’s no need to tell them it isn’t to your taste, or you’ll likely return it for credit. Instead, wholeheartedly share your plans for the gift. Emphasise where you’ll put it in the house or how it brightens up a room. If there’s nothing nice you can say about the item, explain that you’d never heard of that designer before, or playfully explain you’ve found a new favourite shop.
Either way, keep the card positive and focus on the connection and kindness behind the gift. For example:
- Thank you so much for the fruit bowl. It’s such an unusual colour and really brightens up the living room!
- We really appreciate how thoughtful you’ve been in picking those wine glasses. I was just saying to [spouse’s name] that we need to try and visit that shop more! Thank you for introducing us to our new favourite.
People who couldn’t attend but sent a gift
Guests can’t plan for last-minute emergencies, and those who didn’t attend the wedding but still sent a gift should also be recognised for their efforts. If you’re stuck on what to say, try:
- We’re so sorry you weren’t able to be with us on our special day, but of course, we understand! We just wanted to send a note to say thank you for your beautiful gift, and that we hope all is well with you.
People who travelled to see you
People come from far and wide to attend weddings. However, special thanks should be given to anyone who travelled a great distance to attend your wedding or who came from abroad. For example:
- We are so honoured that you travelled all the way from California to come to our little wedding. It was such a beautiful day, made all the more special with your attendance. I can’t thank you enough for the effort you made. Thank you again.
- We are so grateful to you and Auntie for travelling all the way from Glasgow. It sounded like it was quite a tricky journey, so we can’t thank you enough for coming all that way.
People whom you don’t know well
It takes a lot of courage to attend a wedding where you don’t know many people, and anyone who made the effort to attend your wedding in spite of this should be thanked. If you’re stuck on what to say, try:
- Thank you so much for coming to the big day. I really appreciate you coming and representing my school friends!
- Thank you for your presence on our special day. It was made all the more special for you being there.
Anyone else with a significant role in your wedding
You should also send a card to anyone else who played a significant role in your wedding. This includes family and friends who went above and beyond to help make your day special.
While it may not be traditional, expressing your appreciation for their contributions is a lovely way to round off the wedding planning process. A short but heartfelt note, acknowledging their unique role and the joy they brought to your celebration, is the perfect way to say, ‘Thank you for being a part of our love story.’
Should I send a card to someone who didn’t attend the wedding?
It’s polite to still send a wedding card to anyone who:
- Couldn’t attend the wedding, but still sent a gift
- Couldn’t attend the wedding, but still gave you money
- Couldn’t attend the wedding due to ill health, but would have otherwise
- Couldn’t attend the wedding due to a bereavement, but would have otherwise
Sending a wedding card to someone unable to attend the wedding for these reasons is a kind and considerate gesture. It demonstrates your gratitude for their well-wishes, support, and understanding of their situation.
Writing etiquette for wedding thank you cards
Send the card within a week or two
Be sure to send your thank you card within a week or two of your wedding. This will not only ensure your big day is fresh in your guests’ minds, but also make sure you don’t forget who sent what gift or any details about the big day!
Handwrite your cards
Wherever possible, you should handwrite your cards. Although this will take a little more time than typing them, the personal touch and effort put into each note are what make them truly special.
Include both parties
Be sure to address the cards to all the people who attended the wedding. By the same token, be sure to sign the cards off from both yourself and your new spouse. It’s a lovely way to show that you’re grateful for their support and love, both individually and as a united front, in this new chapter of your life together.
Keep it positive
Keep the content of your wedding card light and positive. Focus on expressing your gratitude, sharing cherished moments from your wedding day, or mentioning how their presence added to the joy and love in the atmosphere. Avoid discussing any issues from the big day or telling them you don’t like their gift!
Can you send email thank you cards?
You can absolutely send email thank you cards if it’s easier. However, hand-written is always best. They show that you’ve taken the time and effort to craft a unique message for each recipient, making your appreciation more meaningful.
The bottom line on wedding thank you cards
Wedding thank you cards are a thoughtful and kind way to wrap up your wedding celebrations. Think of them as the final farewell or curtain down. Although they may seem small, these little notes carry immeasurable weight in gratitude. They’re not just a formality — your wedding thank you cards are the cherry on the cake of your special day.
Wedding thank you cards should be sent in good time and should be handwritten. Send a wedding thank you note to anyone who played a significant role in your wedding day, anyone who sent a gift or money, and anyone who would have attended but experienced a personal emergency. If you’re on the fence about whether you should send someone a wedding thank you card or not, our advice is just to send one. Remember — you’ll never regret being a kind person.
If you’re looking for wedding thank you card writing tips, check out our post on what to write in a wedding thank you card. It has great advice on card writing etiquette and some handy wedding card examples to use as inspiration!
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